Help A little guidance Fredlings

[Darthshearer]

Guys following on from my Pork Sword Thread I need a little advice again.

Now, an update. Since Xmas the ex was living at her parents keeping my hanging by a thread. She was like a cat with a mouse playing with me, mentally and emotionally. I waited 4 months for her to come home before I finally asked wtf was going on. Anyways, we split and I felt better.

Anyway, I have met a girl and because of whats gone on with me in the past 6months Ive had my confidence blasted to shreads and I am rather insecure and nervous.

This girl is great looking and a great person, we have an awful lot in common and she seems keen on me. I have had 4 dates with her and everyone has been great. We text / email each other a lot. At the moment I cant get her out of my head at all and she says the same too. She said she doesnt want the dates to stop etc She says some really nice things to me which, I havent had for a long time.

Anyways, last night I went to her house for dinner and we had a great night, were still getting to know each other so were talking a lot about stuff and she asked me about my counselling I was having. I told her about what happend with my mother etc and told her in Feb time I was ready to kill myself, which is prob not true as I know I wouldnt have the guts to do it. She seemed to get down about this but we talked and it was good. She was glad I was straight with her and it ended up a good night.

Now, we texted a little bit when I left her and she said one day she would like for me to be her boyfriend (come on piss takers where are you ) but at the moment were "just seeing each other" With my head still in the clouds with her and also on the floor because of the past half a year I would like to know a few things.

Firstly, what does she mean? I am crap at reading women. She has said she doesnt want to meet anyone else or the dates to stop either.

Secondly, I told her I really liked her and didnt want to push her, I dont know what to do really, were both REALLY shy, do I push a little more or just carry on as we are, as were both having a good time. Seeing each other once at the weekend and once midweek.

Thirdly, I would love to do something a little romantic for her as she hasnt had that by all accounts, any suggestions. I dont want to take her away yet as the errrr "Physical" side of things are still at its infancy and I am happy with that because so is amazing. Maybe a candle lit meal corny I know but I dont know what else?

Fourthly, Im buzzing my tits off I questioned how the hell she was single and that she could do better than me, she just looked at me and said thats why her ex dumped her!!Oooops!

Cheers guys

 

[Calaen]

tbh the line is invisible, you go from having more dates and then before you know it you are an item. Take her out again, and start to ramp up the amount of time you spend with each other. if yuo find that you are still enjoying each others company after spending a few days a week with each other you are in a relationship

 

[Darthshearer]

Well she did say she wanted to see me more but didnt want to go too fast as she knew she would feel uncomfortable with it.

I dont know if somethings happened in the past and I dont really wnat to ask, but so far so good, ill just carry on as I am

 

[mooSe_]

Sounds like it's going ok really, don't panic.

 

[Darthshearer]

Thats one thing I was doing last night. She was tired after a late night on Tuesday so was I so there wasnt the energetic buzz we had at the weekend but we still had a really good laugh.

She is very quiet and shy. One point we were sat there and she started to smile and went quiet and I was asked what was wrong and she said "Nothing, I was just thinking I really like you"

BUZZING \0/

 

[TdC]

tell her you want to be her boyfriend. hold her hand, look soppy and snog her like a teenager. good luck, and don't forget to tell her you know this awesome single guy living in Holland to send all her hot single girly mates to

 

[Trem]

Chuffed things are looking up for you Darthy.

I can't really help in the other stuff though, when in doubt a shovel clout is my catch phrase.

Too far?

 

[Scouse]

and don't forget to tell her you know this awesome single guy living in Holland to send all her hot single girly mates to

Yeah, but I don't live in Holland m8. And I'm not single.

But apart from that, thanks for looking out for me Teedles

 

[`mongoose]

I think everyone else has given you great advice.

You could try probing her interests to see if there's something she's always wanted to do/see/try and then take her on an event type thing. Maybe if she's mentioned something she likes to do or something she misses from the past.

Something that will mean alot to her because it shows you weren't just sitting nodding your head saying "ahuh" when you were chatting on the dates.

Other than that - good luck and take it one step at a time. I know my wife and I irritated the shit out of our family and friends when we were dating because every time they asked us how we were getting on we said we're having fun and that's all we want for the moment. I think both of us knew it was more than that but didn't want to jinx things or start reading things into it at the time. Wierd but there's nout queer as folk as they say oop north

From your travails on here - it sounds to me like you deserve a bit of luck - I sincerely hope this is that little bit.

M

 

[TdC]

thanks for looking out for me Teedles

*bans*

 

[Wazzerphuk]

Sounds like she likes you, but is treading carefully because of the recent history.

Now that you've had a chance to air what happened in the past, I'd generally keep it there now since the baggage/potential suicide thing may have set some alarm bells ringing. It sounds like she wants to get involved, but not too quickly or heavily as she may have doubts as to how stable you are as a person.

I'd keep it going, keep it happy, friendly and let the past stay the past. Think about moving forwards. If she likes you then she will come round.

I would be careful though, women absolutely love destroying and manipulating people's hopes and feelings and they often do so from this position of "more than friend but not boyfriend" thing.

 

[Uara]

Well everyone has said the things that I'd go on to say! The fact she only wants to see you and not other people is a sure sign you're going into a relationship!! Just start going out for a few more dates and meals etc you can never go wrong with that.

Just go with the flow man and good luck to you. Will keep my fingers crossed for you!

 

[JBP|]

Just keep going as you are Darthy it will all fall in to place when you are both ready for it to do so, and i'm sure it will the more comfortable you both feel with each other.

As for the romantic stuff, you don't have to be extravagant so just do what you feel like just don't be false with it, whether its getting her a bunch of flowers, a box of choccies, a meal or simply a card with a nice poem in it, if she loves you it will mean the world to her whatever it is.

Hope it all works out you mate.

 

[tris-]

Finger her.

 

[Marc]

Take her to a Leeds v Saints match! I will serenade you both with "you fill up my senses....."

 

[Chilly]

bang her and she becomes your bird. capiche?

 

[Yoni]

Keep going as you are, it sounds awesome, if it is right it is right you know.

Just keep communicating .

 

[Darthshearer]

Thanks guys

Really annoyed my boss tonight, went to the pub to watch Leeds v Millwall and all I did was text my lady fried.

Guys, I dont know why I am worrying git a text saying:-

"So wish I was seeing you again tonight, Ive not been this happy for nearly 10 years I feel amazing all down to you, I would love t hold you now"

Now, either she likes me or shes a Milwall fan hehe

I am buzzing \0/ Shes awesome. My only issue is jealousy, I know she has a past etc but if I think of ex's I get a little down, simple answer me and her have fun

She Likes me man

 

[mooSe_]

Get in there.

 

[Edmond]

My only issue is jealousy, I know she has a past etc but if I think of ex's I get a little down

You also have a past too, have you thought that she might be thinking the same?

It sounds like its going just fine, you dont need to push it or worry its not going to progress, because it is, this is how its meant to happen, so just go with it and b4 you know it you will be fully loved up

Good luck

 

[Wonk]

It sounds too good to be true, doesn't it? My current gf was the same when we first met. We fell in love instantly, however she wanted to date forever aswell. I asked her after the 3rd date with a rose though, as I was in the military and didn't have much time with her.

Guess what I saw 3 months later on her wall, at her appartment? The rose I gave her, hanging there as it was new. It meant a lot to her, so she had kept it safe.

I also wrote a lot of poems. That was my way of showing my feelings, when I couldn't be there for her.

Now it's just business as usual - but that's how every relationships goes

 

[Darthshearer]

Take her to a Leeds v Saints match! I will serenade you both with "you fill up my senses....."

:lol:

With the way our backs are playing at the moment shell end up a Stains fan! NO WAY Could I live with that :lol:

Oh well at least Leeds got beat yesterday

 

[Bahumat]

Thirdly, I would love to do something a little romantic for her as she hasnt had that by all accounts, any suggestions. I dont want to take her away yet as the errrr "Physical" side of things are still at its infancy and I am happy with that because so is amazing. Maybe a candle lit meal corny I know but I dont know what else?

Buy her some flowers. If she is a little shy, then she may not have had alot of relationships. Let's assume I'm correct with that, so we can also assume she's never been bought flowers before.

 

[old.user4556]

Sounds good.

Pics?