A burden I have kept

[Deebs]

Yo,

Really happy so thought I would share something personal with you, seeing as I think of you as family, well most of you.

My mum has had cancer for several years having had a mascetomy (sp?) right at the beginning. The cancer came back as secondary bone cancer and she fought like a real trooper and it went into remission. Her cancer is now classed as terminal.

This year in February she didn't feel well so went to the Doctor. She was referred and the bad news came, her cancer had awoken and was progressing throughout her body again. My world and my siblings fell apart.

Since February she has been having an intravenous chemo drip and blood transfusions. Sometimes her blood has been that fucked she could not have the chemo and this started me thinking, if she cannot have chemo is the cancer spreading as nothing is being done to stop it. My baby sister rang the hospital to find out and yes, if the chemo was not done the cancer would spread. FUCK!!!

This Monday I rang her from work to find out how she got on, in February her tumour count was 350, they took a measurement and it was 250!!

Oh how happy we all are.

Many of you will know that my family are extremely close under any circumstance and my Mum means the world to me, she has always been there, always puts her kids before herself. She is one of my best friends. She talks and acts toward me and my brother/sisters as if she was on of us, she only gets shitty if my brother and me talk about birds infront of her, Dad loves it though

The last few months have been hell, for her and for us. The ups and downs etc. I hope that this is the turning point and that she will be with us for a long while yet!!

Anyway, I know that we have been given a little extra time, but the news has been awesome and some of you have had to endure me talking to you about it on a more personal level. I thank you for being there and taking the time to listen to some old git with problems burdening you stuff you don't need to know.

Needed to share that. My thoughts are with those who has lost loved ones, I understand, to a point, what you must be feeling.

 

[Jupitus]

Jup> <Deebs
Jup> <Deebs' Mum
Jup> <Deebs' Family

Send her my love and thoughts T ...

 

[SawTooTH]

You're not alone. My mother had breast cancer when I was 18. They thought they had cured her but it returned 20 years later. It was a close fought thing as her weight fell off due to the cachexia but somehow they got it right and she responded to some of the fairly recent treatments. Its been 5 years now and she's at this moment on holiday in France, hopefully getting drunk and having fun. I have to say each year is special really and I try to spoil her rotten.

It's a tough one and I know how I felt at the time so best wishes and I hope your mums progress continues.

 

[Doomy]

If there is one thing id like to stab in the face its cancer. Lost my niece at age of 4 and my mums just developed breast cancer, luckily they caught it early and she is well on the way to recovery.

All you can do is just be yourself, limit yourself to asking how she is to not too often as my mum says that asking her about it is really a big drain.

'Are you alright Doomy's Mum'?
'Yes I am just fine thanks'
Now now, are you REALLY alright?' person extends hand onto wrist.

Cancer is a bitch, there is nothing you can do about it apart from letting doctors work their magic (funnily enough my nieces doctors are currently being sued for massive neglect but thats another story), there's nothing YOU can do yourself which is the most frustrating thing. Just be there. And dont cramp your mum, nothing worse than being felt sorry for.

All the best anyways, and as the say, better out than in.

 

[Sydrik]

Having extended my best wishes to both tony and his family at many points over the last few months another one seems a bit silly. But you know we are all part of your extended 'family' and thus care about you and your relatives.

Chin up buddy and was so glad to hear the good news today

 

[Deebs]

Oh trust me I do. I live each day as it happens and no way on earth do I cramp my mum.

My thoughts go out to the both of you, a frightening statistic is that 1 in 3 people develop cancer, which, in my opinion, is fucking awful.

At every opportunity I speak to my mum, spend time, take her out. I do not want to feel "I wish I had done more with her" ever.

 

[Turamber]

I lost my father to cancer in '97 and a very close friend to breast cancer last year. Its awful to see those we love suffering and not be able to take away the cause for it. There will undoubtedly be many ups and downs in the months to come, and it will be an emotional rollercoaster for your mom. Just hang on in there and give her all the support and love you can.

One of the worst things about breast cancer is the number of secondary cancers that it can lead to. There are a number of drugs on the market that can reduce the chances of it spreading and add a great deal of life expectancy. I can't recall the name of the drug my friend was taking but will see if her son can. It may have been the one reported here (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/3548121.stm) but I'm not 100% sure.

 

[TedTheDog]

:wub:

 

[dysfunction]

Nice one Deebs!!

 

[Dommers]

Best wishes to you and your family

 

[Brynn]

My nan has Breast Cancer, I was naieve thinking that breast cancer wouldn't affect someone who was 87, I dont really know why

She has refused chemo, as she doesn't want to be housebound, and is taking some new drugs, and the tumor is getting smaller.

My thoughts and prayers to you and your family Deebs.

 

[Doh_boy]

Not much to add to everything else just enjoy what time you have and hope for the best.

 

[Tilda]

My sister had a hodgkins(I think) lymphoma and had the whole chemo thing.
My thoughts are with you and your family, I hope your mum continues to improve.

Tilda

 

[Tom]

Blimey. Kind of puts my problems into perspective. Good luck mate.

 

[Wij]

Not much Cancer in my family thank fuck but my Aunt has breast cancer and my cousin's husband is probably going to die from it quite soon so I know a bit about it. You ain't alone and it isn't always fatal. Even if it is then make sure you enjoy your life with your mum because we all die anyway it's how you lived with her that counts. Would you rather she lived to 105 and you only saw her once a year ? Bollocks to that, have a good life.

 

[Opt1]

All the best Deebs, to you, your mother and all your family.

Can't quite imagine how it must be, but hang in there, tis amazing what Doctors and Science can do these days.

Best wishes n snuggles,

Flopti

 

[Gengi]

I hope it goes well for you Deebs, I lost my father to lung cancer in 2002, my mum had breast cancer several years ago but is clear now.
You are right in spending as much time as you can with your mum.

to cancer

Later

Gengee

 

[Mazling]

A sudden accident can be terrible, but not-knowing, the waiting game I know is a special kind of pain. My thoughts are with you and your family. Get up and live it up!

 

[Trem]

Women are tough and mums are even tougher.

Cancer is no match for a mum!

G'wan mumma Deebs, kick that cancers arse.

 

[Bodhi]

This is a subject quite close to me as well as just before Xmas last year I was diagnosed with bladder cancer. Luckily it was still very early on and was easily zapped, still nothing can prepare you for the headfuck associated with that particular C-word. Every time now I get the slightest pain in my abdomen the paranoias go into overdrive. Luckily most of the time its either wind a full bladder or perhaps something I picked up from a skanky Stafford slag, but still there's always the thought in the back of my mind "Oh shit it's back".


My thoughts are with you and yer maw.

 

[Lazarus]

Sorry to hear that Deebs.

appreciate all the time you can with her.

 

[xane]

I lost my wife to cancer in 2003 after 6 years of fighting, leaving me a single Dad, it's something I would not wish on my worst enemy.

Be aware that medical technology is being developed constantly, even during my wife's time of illness they were starting to replace the chemo with better medicines, even if a treatment gives a slim chance, keeps you alive for just a few more years, it allows the possibility of a new development coming up that can cure or abate it.

I wish you and your mother well.

 

[Anar]

Best wishes to you and your family, m8.

 

[Furr]

Lost my dad to renal cancer in '01, so can understand completely the worry or it all. Best wishes Mr deebs

 

[ECA]

Both my grandparents died of cancer :/
Its not a very nice thing.

 

[Custodian]

Makes ya think dunnit.
Maybe time I phoned home.

 

[TdC]

my thoughts are with you and your family Tony.

as said before you(we) aren't alone. I hope things will be well.

 

[Xtro]

All the best mate.

Lost both my parents a long time ago, mother to breast cancer.

GL.

 

[Uncle Sick]

Jup> <Deebs
Jup> <Deebs' Mum
Jup> <Deebs' Family
Sick> < Jup


Hehehe...


And good luck to Mr. Deeb's mum, of course!
I cannot imagine how stressful it must be for everyone involved.

 

[Deebs]

Thanks peeps. It just shows how much cancer impacts each and every one of us in some way.

My thoughts are with everyone here, I understand exactly what you are or were going through at the time.

Technology is indeed progressing and the chemo treatment my mum is currently having is making inroads, for how long is anyone's guess. The most important thing about this treatment, apart from working, is that my mum is not losing her hair. During her last 2 treatments she lost her hair and quite frankly hit her really hard as all her life it was down to her bum.

I remember her saying to me back in February, in tears, that she could not go through the pain again of losing her hair. Thankfully that has not happened.

Yes to me and you that may seem like a trivial matter, but to someone who has cancer it can and sometimes is a big thing to them.

She is on the up, spoke to her today on the way home and tried to make her think she was losing the plot till she twigged and called me a "little bastard"

One day I will tell you about how she was mistaken for my wife