20 years too late

[Shagrat]

I appear, sometime in the last year to have become more attractive to women than I previously was.....

been married for 14 years and got 2 kiddies. Never really had "offers" since I got married, and too be brutally honest, the offers were pretty few and far between before then (I was always the quiet keep out the way kind....)

hit 40 this year.

in june, went to a primary school reunion night, walked a girl home as had a broken foot and was invited in for coffee, thought nothing of it (nothing ever happens to me right....), she came back from the kitchen in her underwear carrying the coffee "are you sure its only coffee you want?" kinda flattered, she was single and good looking.....ran away....

july, 40th birthday night out at a club in leicester we all used to go to years ago, wife left to go home as she was working the next day. next thing i know i had some random womens tongue down my throat (i was horrendously drunk so its all a bit blurry)...

last month, school reunion #2, should have been 10 out, as fate would have it, only 2 of us. she's married as well, we have a few drinks and get on well talking about life and stuff and all of sudden she tells me she thinks ive turned into quite a dish and that at the first reunion she called dibs on me with her mates because she saw me first. I kiss her goodnight at the end of the night and we say we'll go out again as we've had a good night. (im seeing this as just a friends thing, we had loads in common, im thinking now this is my naive with girls thing again)..

so we exchange a couple of texts staying chatty etc, and now she tells me she's getting divorced from hubby, been coming for a while etc. so suddenly its not 2 married people being friends, its a married me being friend with a potential divorcee on the rebound.

trouble is she's had depression before so I dont just want to drop her before things get complicated as she's got loads of shit on her plate atm. The missus knows we're talking and stuff but I cant see her being that chuffed about it now she's "competition".

all these offers, 20 years too late, and far too much agro and complication to deal with..argh


life can be a bitch sometimes

blimey thats a lot of text, think im more drunk than i realised.

 

[Shagrat]

and in the wrong thread as well.

defninitely too much too drink lol

oh great mods, move this to General.....

 

[Soazak]

You want to get rid before the depression hits again. Been there, got the T-shirt, trust me, if you don't cut ties now, it will never end.

 

[old.Tohtori]

So let me get this straight; You're complaining about sex offers, when you're 40?

If that's your problem, i'd love to see your good stuff

 

[Moriath]

tell her you like her shoes !!

Or ask your missus if shes up for a three some

 

[Soazak]

So let me get this straight; You're complaining about sex offers, when you're 40?

If that's your problem, i'd love to see your good stuff

No, he's complaining that when he was 20, he got no offers. Now he's 40 and married, they come flooding in

It's always the case, the best offers come when you're attached

 

[Shagrat]

Hasn't this been moved yet?

I was feeling maudlin last night wasnt I

and yeah Carlos is right, your only desirable when your off the menu.......haha

 

[Ctuchik]

Hasn't this been moved yet?

I was feeling maudlin last night wasnt I

and yeah Carlos is right, your only desirable when your off the menu.......haha

A couple of friends saved their old engagement rings after they broke up with their girlfriends, and they put them on every once in a while when they go to the pub. They get hooked up more often when they wear them then when they don't.

Or at least so they say, i'm not perverted enough to verify their claims though...

 

[Shagrat]

well she'll probably text me tomorrow to ask how my weekend went.

I'll see if I can knock her back without causing too much collateral damage.

think i'll just have to watch how much I drink when I'm out. I get into this "im enjoying this, I wonder how far I can push it" frame of mind when Im plastered then wake up the next morning and think "FUCK".

jaegerbombs seem to figure in the generation of this mindset, but theyre sooooooooo nice

 

[Raven]

Your decision to make.

Fuck it off now (and I mean now) or cheat on the wife, and deal with any related guilt/fall out.

Someone else's problems should not come between you and your wife, unless you want them to.

Flirting is all good and well, we all do it now and again but you are playing with fire.

 

[Gwadien]

Night out in Leicester? - Bet that was shit.

 

[Lamp]

what Raven said 100%

Enjoy the ego boost, but don't let your cock rule your head. Ignore the temptresses

 

[Damini]

You might be suffering from Sean Bean syndrome.

Observe:

Add time:

I DON'T CARE THAT IT'S A HUGE PICTURE! Look at his face. His beautiful, rugged, face. Mmmm.... Beany....

As an aside though, what's going on with you and your missus? Seems something must be astray if you end up snogging people on nights out. Is it just that the temptation has never arisen before, and if it had you'd have gone for it then, or is something a bit wobbly at the mo?

 

[old.user4556]

I will illustrate my advice with a couple of Chris Rock examples:

"when you're single, nobody calling your ugly ass, now the phone's ringing off the hook"

Commitment Dilemma - YouTube

And some other helpful videos

Chris Rock-Never Scared-Married Life - YouTube

Chris Rock Offer dick - YouTube

 

[TdC]

think i'll just have to watch how much I drink when I'm out. I get into this "im enjoying this, I wonder how far I can push it" frame of mind when Im plastered then wake up the next morning and think "FUCK".

jaegerbombs seem to figure in the generation of this mindset, but theyre sooooooooo nice

this is scarily extremely close to my weekend 0o

 

[Shagrat]

As an aside though, what's going on with you and your missus? Seems something must be astray if you end up snogging people on nights out. Is it just that the temptation has never arisen before, and if it had you'd have gone for it then, or is something a bit wobbly at the mo?

It's more to do with the temptation never having arisen before really.

wifey has a borderline personality disorder, and finds it difficult to express herself emotionally or deal with other people doing the same thing (she hates being hugged/kissed on the cheek etc). Even with me she can initially flinch away when I go to hug her, and she has to check herself from doing it etc. cant help herself its second nature.

I suppose I've just got so used to a relationship where this kind of thing happens that when all of a sudden some girl is happy to sit on my lap and talk to me etc that I just go along for the ride.....

and its not like its every night out, its just happened a couple of times recently...not that that makes it any better really.


i should have listened to Zamo, just say no.

 

[old.user4556]

That's usually the killer blow for a man; I've been there.

If you're not getting enough physical interaction from your woman, not necessarily sex, then you'll be attracted to girls that do give you that.

There's no shame in feeling that way, it's only natural. The hard part is trying to work out why one's respective wife doesn't like touching / sex, accepting that they're maybe not attracted to you anymore and moving on from it.

 

[DaGaffer]

That's usually the killer blow for a man; I've been there.

If you're not getting enough physical interaction from your woman, not necessarily sex, then you'll be attracted to girls that do give you that.

There's no shame in feeling that way, it's only natural. The hard part is trying to work out why one's respective wife doesn't like touching / sex, accepting that they're maybe not attracted to you anymore and moving on from it.

Except he has kids, so its a bit more complicated than that. Sometimes you just have to keep it in you pants.

 

[Shagrat]

and thats where its staying...

 

[old.user4556]

Walking away, certainly; but I object to society's general viewpoint that feeling like this is wrong - too many men are labelled bastards too quickly. But of course, it does depend on how they play it.

 

[Gwadien]

Where did you go in Leicester btw? - out of curosity(sp?)?

 

[Shagrat]

Where did you go in Leicester btw? - out of curosity(sp?)?

the mighty Fan Club

used to go every weekend when i was 18-19, there and next door to Sector 5/Alcatraz

 

[Job]

You are posting this on the internet.

 

[old.user4556]

You are posting this on the internet.

No, really?!

 

[Shagrat]

You are posting this on the internet.

i was wearing a tin foil hat while i posted it though, so im ok right?

 

[Wazzerphuk]

As women get older they get more desperate. Hormones etc. I wouldn't go getting all cocky

 

[old.user4556]

As women get older they get more desperate.

Also true. Women will also use sex to get a man... then complain that all men want is sex...

Strange.

 

[Chilly]

Does your wife have an internet?

 

[russell]

talk to your wife dude, before it all gets out of hand x

 

[Zenith.UK]

And this is why I'll go as far as having a mild laugh with women. As soon as I sense anything more than plain flirting, I back off holding my titanium shield (my wedding ring is titanium). I bit like Bruce Willis at the beginning of Die Hard 2.

It's also part of the reason I'm somewhat antisocial. An old mate of mine got in touch by email a couple of weeks ago. I think I scared him off because he's not replied since, and I wasn't even TRYING to drive him away.