Herberts

Tom · Jun 26, 2004

Today was a laugh. Was filming next to Brighton Pier, and 2 pikies rode up on their bikes and started shouting every time our presenter tried to speak to camera. The 2 guys I was working with very politely asked them to stop, repeatedly, and we managed 2 takes before they started up again.

"FUCKING *****, I OWN THIS FUCKING PIER U WANKERS"

"Guys, please, just give us 2 minutes and we'll be gone"

"FUCKOFF WE WERE HERE FIRST, WE CAN FUCKING SAY WHAT WE WANT"

I've no patience for scum like this, and standing there with my gear around my neck, I couldn't help but to glare at the noisiest one. He noticed, walked right up to my face, and said "I'M FUCKING SICK OF THIS WANKER STARING AT ME LIKE I'M A PIECE OF SHIT, IF HE DOESN'T STOP IT I'M GONNA FUCKING LUMP HIM".

Now normally, I'd be a bit worried at this point, but when its a 14-year old half my size mouthing off at me, I really don't get that excited.

"I'M GONNA GET MY FUCKING DAD DOWN TO LUMP YOU ONE YOU WANKER"

Never in my life have I wanted to punch somebody as much as I did at that moment. The icing on the cake would have been that as soon as he was down on the floor, nose bleeding profusely, I would have picked up his mountain bike, and thrown the fucker into the sea (a good 30 feet below us). The trouble is, you hit these *****, and you're the one who ends up in jail! If I hadn't been working, I would have happily done it, but a TV crew tends to be a bit conspicuous, and our hotel was only a couple of hundred yards away, so I would have been nicked eventually.

God damn, I really, REALLY, want to drive the 300 miles back down there, find the little ****, and kick his balls up around his ears. I'm not a violent person either.

Paradroid · Jun 26, 2004

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That was you?

Sharma · Jun 26, 2004

I would have just lamped the twat on the nose and maybe kick him in the teeth a bit.

By the time he's wobbled the words out you would be happily on your way home.

Athan · Jun 26, 2004

Aye Tom, I know the feeling. Several times I've wanted to thump some cheeky little fuckers around here (not least being the one that tried to throw a stone at me the other day merely because I replied in the negative when asked if I had a cigarette).

-Ath

caLLous · Jun 26, 2004

"Save us two's mate!"
"No"
"*insert coin in the Random Chav Insult Generator*"

Gengi · Jun 26, 2004

It is a sad state of affairs, and what is probably more sad is that the chav's father ( if he knew wo he was ) would have behaved as the shitebag indicated.
<Drifts off into a reverie> Had I done something similair at that age my father would have been far more inclined to 'lump' me and say thank you to Tom for adjusting my attitude.

It is only 20 odd years, just more than a generation, but the deterioration, or perhaps the spread of chavdom we are seeing in society has become almost a pandemic. The lack of discipline, the complete disregard for authority, a total lack of respect for property are all becoming far more evident within society as a whole rather than being restricted to a very small minority.
By fuck I am getting old

Later

Deacan · Jun 26, 2004

I never get problems, but i think thats due to the fact i can intimidate people with ease.

SawTooTH · Jun 26, 2004

Im lucky in that nothing like that ever happens to me. I am built like a brick shithouse though so maybe thats it. My wife says that I look very menacing , maybe itsthe short hair , who knows, but its stood me in good stead over the years.

Wij · Jun 26, 2004

I'd think I'd have accidentally spat in his face and then ignored him. If he twats you first you'll get off

Xavier · Jun 26, 2004

Wij said:
I'd have accidentally spat in his face

Outside of the "industry" in which you work wij, bumming TdC for a buck an hour, that's actually pretty hard to do

heh

Wij · Jun 26, 2004

Not sex-piss :eek:

Sar · Jun 26, 2004

Thank you please...

dysfunction · Jun 26, 2004

I would have thought there would have been something you could do? Legally I mean to get rid of these idiots...
After all they are costing you money by delaying your work...How about the police??

Sometimes living in South africa is good...you'd have the TV studios security thumping the brats and sending them on their way...

Xavier · Jun 26, 2004

I'd either call the police or local council in that kind of situation. If you're filming on one of their public leisure spots your location people probably got their permission in advance, in which case they'll more than happily instuct the local plod to come play guard-dog and bitchslap any peons who try to interfere.

RandomBastard · Jun 26, 2004

my response would have been to look at him very sturdily, probably while holding my spanner (different part of the industry there

and say "Do you really think that threatening me with your father is going to make you look like a man? Because it isnt, now kindly stop annoying us before you do something stupid"

Cask · Jun 26, 2004

I'm pretty crap at dealing with situations like that, prolly would have been struggling to stay cool and not give them a nice emotional reaction causing endorphins to leak from their attention seeking cells. I'd have taken the wimpy option and stopped for a break or gone to the pub for an hour and hope they've cleared off when I returned.

Or if I was a cop I'd like nothing better than good reason to give the local hooligans a ride in a police car. Tempted to apply for the police just for that reason

TheJkWhoSaysNi · Jun 26, 2004

I'd have looked at him blankly while he was shouting then when he stopped i'd have said "finished?" and walked passed him then continued filming. After a couple of times they'd get bored and find someone else to pester.

mank! · Jun 26, 2004

SawTooTH said:
Im lucky in that nothing like that ever happens to me. I am built like a brick shithouse though so maybe thats it. My wife says that I look very menacing , maybe itsthe short hair , who knows, but its stood me in good stead over the years.

I'm even more surprised considering you live in Swindon.

Tom · Jun 27, 2004

TheJkWhoSaysNi said:
I'd have looked at him blankly while he was shouting then when he stopped i'd have said "finished?" and walked passed him then continued filming. After a couple of times they'd get bored and find someone else to pester.

You can't continue filming though. That was the point, and they knew it. Antagonise them, and you can't film. Of course, chavs floating face down in the sea don't make that much noise, but that's too much to expect tbh.

What really amazed me is that the sea was really good, the sun was out, and so were about 20 surfers. These kids were shouting over the parapet "FUCKING SURFERS, *****". I mean, how crap would your life be if that was all you could find to do to amuse yourself? Give me the surfboard anyday.

caLLous · Jun 27, 2004

Just buy 'em a cheap bottle of White Lightning and send 'em on their way.

Deacan · Jun 27, 2004

Pfffftttt!!

Frosty Jacks > White Lightning :touch:

Damini · Jun 28, 2004

Buy them a bottle of meths.

"A man can't see, he can't fight."

YES SENSAI!

jaba · Jun 28, 2004

Damini, how is it going with your crusade against the chav empire outside your house?

Damini · Jun 28, 2004

I don't know - I had a flat tyre on the motorway on Friday, which was terrifying, and I don't know if it happened on the road or if it had been stabbed and slowly deflated while I was driving.

jaba · Jun 28, 2004

That sucks, hope it wasnt too painful! No more chavs burning out cars in your street though?

Tom · Jun 28, 2004

Damini said:
I don't know - I had a flat tyre on the motorway on Friday, which was terrifying, and I don't know if it happened on the road or if it had been stabbed and slowly deflated while I was driving.

You'll be able to find out when the nice mechanic repairs it for you. Was it front or back? Back is worse, so I'm told.

dysfunction · Jun 28, 2004

Front is worse cos it affects your steering which is not good when travelling at 70mph or so...

Tom · Jun 28, 2004

Well, I thought that a front wheel blowout/puncture only reduces your ability to steer, whereas on the rear wheel it can cause the back end to swing around?

mank! · Jun 28, 2004

Tom said:
Well, I thought that a front wheel blowout/puncture only reduces your ability to steer, whereas on the rear wheel it can cause the back end to swing around?

Vice versa I think. You can drive ok with a punctured rear tyre as it doesn't effect your steering whereas a front puncture does. Any sort of blowout when you're travelling at speed would cause you to spin, crash and go ouch.

Damini · Jun 28, 2004

It was the front driver side. I didn't spin out though, but I did have to wobble my way across two lanes of traffic in a hurry. I guess I'll find out on Wednesday when I get to a garage.

And no, no setting fire to cars. Yet. When does the summer holidays start?

Herberts

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