old.Tohtori
FH is my second home
- Joined
- Jan 23, 2004
- Messages
- 45,210
Ok here we go. One day when i was just posting some, as my good friend tank would say, "Major boring shi-et.", i checked the message length. Well it was noway near full as the limit for a post is 40000 of marks. So, what popped into my mind at that very instant? Food. I was hungry but what came to my mind after that was amazing. Drinks. Couldn't eat without something to wash it down with, but the THIRD thought that came to my mind was just unbelievable. What if, in some way, somehow and by harvesting all the knowledge, wisdom, streetsmarts and eggs someone, somewhere would be able to write a post with 40000 marks on it? Wouldn't that be something? Atleast it would be a record that wouldn't be broken in a minute or two. Atleast not by writing it. Maybe by using copy/paste/quote or any other shortcut things like that. Just sit down on a computer, start spewing out things from high heavens to the deepest depths of hell and not stop until the computer made a little "bleep!" and notify that the post was complete. Then i though about finishing the drink i had on my table and go refresh it. It was only a week or two later that my mind woke up, gave me a good kick in the cranium as a punishment for drinking too much liquids of alcoholic nature last night and stated "wake up dummy and get to work!". Well, after i finished the day at the office i realised i could infact write the 40000 mark post myself! Afterall i had almost 3000 posts on Barrysworld and countless numbers of un"published" stuff on my computer proving i could be the man, erhm, seel to do it. So hop to it and into the shower. Been a few days since i went so it was due time to wash off that dust from last fridays sanddive in the shore. That was fun, just roll around in sand. But after i emerged from the shower, sparkling clean and fluffy as a daisy in a pighollering contest, whatever that means, i sat down to my computer and logged into barrysworld. Click on a "new thread" button and i was well under way in being, perhaps, the first ever to go all the way in posting. I started writing: "Ok here we go. One day when i was just posting...", it was a good start and perhaps one day everyone would remember those immortal words "Ok, here we go." as the words that launched upon the boards such a massive amount of different marks that somehow, when put into a right order, would form words. The words would form lines and it all would expand into something as ridicilous as "one size fits all" pants on pavarotti. Ofcourse at this point i remembered that anyone, with even half a brain, would have closed the thread allready or posted something in the lines of "Too long imo" or "I stopped at -Ok.-" and decided that i'd post that i knew it would happen. Atleast that way i could quote myself when they did. But there are people who actually might read all of this and for those people i give a firm salute. You people are insane, almost as insane as the person sitting here and just letting his fingers move like posessed on the keyboard and post about something that is most certainly off-topic but in a way just what the people expect from Teh Seel. I can't see my fingers at times, i just let them flow over the keyboard and let out everything that my mind thinks of. This would be a good day to know the 10 finger writing thing my teacher once said i would need. Atleast would make it easier to check if i misspleed something like mispelled. Ah well, have to trust that my fingers know more about writing then my brain knows about the atomic reaction of a papaya fruit to a seed of an orange. This isn't actually that bad. I kinda enjoy this, just letting everything in my brain to flow into the fingers and with the help of a keyboard into the monitor. I thought by now i would've been bored like most of the people who read this and would've gone to do something else instead. Like arranging my socks by color, then teach them to arrange themselves in order of length, color and rank. Ofcourse i would need ranks to the socks but i could train one of the shirts to do that. Almost tempted at checking on how much i've allready written here. Ok, maybe a quick peek but then it's back to writing this thing. Otherwise i'll be writing this until i'm old and gray as gandalf himself and not even a fraction as wise as the fruit he carries in his pocket. 4340. Well that isn't too bad, only 9 more pletheras of text like this and i would have even 3000 marks left for a second part of the thread. Maybe i'll do one of those, "This thread took so and so long to make, with so and so many cigarettes smoked and with so and so many drinks of this and that." things after i'm done. Have to remember to leave something like, 150 marks for that or something. Also i should start marking up statistics, like that drink and the time i started. 21:37. There, i can come back and erase it after i'm done. Nah, i’ll leave it be, afterall it’s 5 more marks to the text and i bet when i’m nearing 40000 marks i’ll be glad i left those 5 there. Maybe i should stop writing things that are short for something. Like write 5 as five and would’ve as would have. Or maybe not, it’s not afterall that fast as i’d have to think about what i write a bit more and it would feel like i was cutting corners to get to the goal. I wonder if i’ll get those moments, while writing this, like mountain climbers and such get. Those moments where i think that i can’t go on and i should’ve just stayed home. Well considering i –am- home it’s a bit silly i guess. But who knows, i’ll probably write about that when i get there. Maybe i’ll tell a little inspiring story in the meanwhile, afterall some people might actually still be reading this and would like some change into this strange babble. So, there was this ant. He was working hard every day like every other ant around him. But he was thinking ”Is this all? Is this all i’m good for?” and all in all didn’t feel too good about his contribution to the world. One day the ant died. Just keeled over and stopped living and went to ant-heaven. There was this little golden ant-road, golden ant-gate and by that gate was this tiny ant-angel that looked at the ant and said: ”Before i can let you past these gates and into heaven i need to ask you, do you feel that you completed your task in life?” The little ant looked down for a moment, thought about it and shook his head. ”No, i just worked all day and there was nothing special about it.” The an-tangel smiled and pointed down at the earth and the ant looked. ”See that man there? Just a few months before you died he was going to shoot himself. He had lost his job, his wife and all meaning to his life.He had the gun to his head and just as he was going to pull the trigger he saw you. You were carrying that big leaf back to the hive and the man could only amaze at how a little thing like you could just keep on going, carrying that whole leaf on your own. He took strength from you and carried on, thinking that if a little ant can do that, he can surely live on. You see my little friend, it’s not how big you are, how meaningless you think you are or how useless you think your life is that matters. It’s the others around you, even the ones you don’t notice and the lives that we effect that matters.” That was a nice story, kinda made it up as i went along but i think it has a nice positive message. Wasn’t that refreshing? Ah well, back to the meaningless babble. Babble, bible, is the bible just babble? Ooh, religion! Now there’s a good subject to talk about and fill a few thousand marks. Actually i can’t think of anything else then that joke about a dyslexic atheist laying on a bed thinking if there’s a dog. That still makes me laugh. Also it’s funny that i’m still doing this. Holy heck in a handbasket i think this is almost two full pages of text with no real purpose. Ah well, back to it and out to fill 8 more of those lovely pages. 4000 marks for one page. Hmm, that’s not really much of text. Afterall explaininig how an icecube can reach the same velocity as a bullet, in the national rifle organisation boards, would take atleast 6000 marks. Might be more interesting though then to read about how Teh Seel writes about some strange things and mostly about the writing itself. Can’t blame me, i’m not the one reading this, i just wrote it. Even if i had invented the atomic bomb i never would’ve told people to USE it. Maybe that’s the little thing the scientists forgot to mention to people. ”Ok, this is the greatest weapon mankind has ever seen but..umm..well..don’t use it. It’s nasty, with a big bang and..well, just trust us.” Then again they probably would’ve been shot, told ”nah nah” and shot again. I don’t understand why soldier who shoots a scientist would need to say ”nah nah” after that like a little kid. It’s not like he got the last popsicle, he freaking shot them! Then again we ARE talking about american soldiers so anything is possible. Well not ANYTHING. Saying ”anything is possible with american soldiers” is like saying ”you can use cheese with anything”. I wouldn’t dream of putting cheese in my icecream so i doub’t an american soldier can so anything. They would if they could but they can’t so they won’t. Well say that three times fast and call my grandmas poodle betty. I think i’m nearing 10000 marks now. Pheewie that’s a lot of letters and numbers. How do i know? Well i checked. Have to do that once in a while to keep myself clear on how much more i can write. Actually it doesn’t matter since all i write have no start OR and ending so i could just stop now...nah! Not finished yet here people! I got atleast 30k of letters and numerous words to write still. I wonder what will happen when i click on the ”post thread” link when i’m done. The forums might crash, SkyNet might go online, hamsters might learn how to fly. Wouldn’t that be terrible? Well, it would look fun as the devil running around with a hagendas trying to get to hell in time for friends before it melts but think of the guys who live on making those little wheels that hamster run in. They would loose their livelyhood, they would have to go on social wellfare and their wifes or husbands would probably leave them. Just take a moment to think about that invention. I wonder if the first tests didn’t go that well. First they put the hamster on the ground and it would just Swhoom! run off into the distance and disappear behind the horizon. Ok, so they put the little guy in a cage. Now the hamster runs forwards, splat! goes againt the cage and keeps on running against it. Well that actually would’ve been quite an invention ’cause you’d need smaller cages. But i guess they thought it would look even cooler if the hamster ran in one place for a reason instead of its own stupidity to run forwards. So they take a wheel and put the hamster run in that. Strange people those, experimenting on hamsters when all they wanna do is run forwards and disappear into the sunset. And talking about hamsters. If there is such a thing as god, let’s assume for the sake of the hamster related story that there is a bearded old fart ruling over all things, i KNOW that he made the hamster into a pet. Heck, if it’s small, cuddly, fluffy with two cute black pearls for eyes it just has to be an invention that has to be caged so people can stare at them runnning in that silly little wheel. Now who’s more simple, the hamster running in the wheel or the human watching the hamster run in one place and actually enjoying it? I bet hamsters run in that wheel because they love to giggle at people who watch them do it. I’m quite sure they don’t get on that wheel and think ”Oh gee golly wiz today i’m gonna reach the end of this track.” and i higly doubt they get on it and go ”Huf huf! Time to burn that fat away babeh! Time to exerzizzle!” They just get on it, start running and go ”Yes, come closer puny human. Watch my entrancing running and give me food.” Smart little critters. Talking about entertaining people. Parrots. Hell! They learn one word and their set for a home, food and good times for life. If i could get a meal every time i say something like ”Polly wants a cracker!” or ”Kraa! Hello!” i’d do that for a living too. Talking about making a living. For every job there is someone who is willing and able to do it. I do believe there are people who are reasearching for better toothpaste or for better yarn. That’s a ”washout” if any on a field of science. Someone wants to do research on combustion engines or alternate fuel supplies and ends up developing better paste for people who want their teeth sparkly white. I wonder how many people actually read this. Maybe i’ll make a check. Everyone who actually read this thing this far, remember to add the line ”Carrots are orange and that’s a wonderful thing.” as a quote in your reply. I bet i get two quotes like that. Max. Oh well, it’s not like i’m doing this for a good reason or for educational purposes. I’m just babbling on the boards to max out the postlimit and see how long it will be and what will actually happen. Probably nothing. Atleast if all else fails i can say that i’ve done it all on Barrysworld. Posted pictures, used smileys, written replies with meaning, made fun of people, congratulated people, flamed, been flamed at, made people laugh…and on top of all that and more i can say i posted something with 40000 marks. Then i can retire. Hey, maybe that’s why i’m writing this. Could it be that Teh Seel has given all that is needed for the community and it’s time Teh Seel went away? Maybe this isn’t just some willynilly attempt to break a record in the longest post, maybe this isn’t just about finding out if the max limit is infact 40000 marks, maybe it’s my final words and goodbye to all who travel the pages of Barrysworld and have been on a wild ride with ups and downs from lags to bugs and from temporary setbacks to funny jokes. I still remember the times when SFXMan filled three pages of ”last poster” with his name, the time when Teh Seel came to life, red twactor of Unca Sick and so much more. Well, wasn’t that a flash from the past. Maybe i’ll just put ”The final post of teh Seel. Let’s go out with a bang!” as the topic and turn to a ghost that comes around every so often to comment on something if i REALLY have something constructive to add. Sure as hell many out there who would love that to happen, maybe even some who would hate that to happen. It would be a grand leaving. 40k of letters, thousands of words, all crammed into one post like the filling of an arnolds donut. A legacy of sorts, a guideline for those to follow, an inspiration the seels of tomorrow. Heck. Didn’t even think of that when i started this shibang, maybe that’s it. Well, we’ll see when i get near the end and it’s still a bit further away. Whatever may be, atleast this will be the last post for a long long time that has no real meaning and is only the ramblings Teh Seel. It is kind of a standard allready, most of what i write has no point but some do manage to get the giggles out of people. When you write as much as i do, one can’t ofcourse expect for every post to be a grande royale funnyhour, there’s bound to be those threads that just disppear somewhere into the flames, pictures and random other threads that all the others in these boards write. I wonder what people will think about when they read this, who they actually are behind those avatars. Afterall they are somewhat like me, sitting by a computerin a room somewhere around the world, reading what i wrote and replying to them. Humans, with lives, millions of stories, countless events. And there’s six billion of us around this blue planet of ours. If only all those stories could be written into a book and someone, millions of years from now could look at it and amaze of the culture we had. Bullshit. Humankind sucks really, we are a virus, a plague of this world and the world will sigh in relief when were gone. Well world, i flip you the bird since i ain’t getting of this planet just yet! Well let’s see where were at, how far to we have to climb still and just how long is this post allready. 16160. That’s almost halfway through allready and i’ve spent about 2 hours to write this. With the cigbrakes, tv checks and all that is. Seems like you have to read a bit more to get to the end, maybe there will be the ultimate truth in here somewhere. I bet i’m not the only one who has thought of this, but i’m quite sure i’m the only one who has the insanity, ability for babble and downright seelines to actually do it. Some might say i don’t have a life but this takes only a fraction of one day to do so it’s not that much. Some people have used days to get a number in a agame to 1200 so they can see the words ”Master Crafter” in a box so i don’t think this is that much more insane. It’s all in a days work. It doesn’t seem that much when your doing it but when you look back you notice just how much you actually did. I think i’ll be able to enjoy the feeling i get when i see this complete. Funny, i’ve learned to use my left hand for the spacebar while writing this since the right side of the spacebar isn’t working that well. Someone actually said that it looks like i’m posessed when i write, the fingers moving on the keyboard and the words that appear on the screen. I dunno, i just zone out and start writing, the words just come together and i feel like everything around me turns into a blur. Just like when i work, if i concentrate i can blur out everything else and realise 8 hours later i haven’t drinked, eaten or even smoked during the whole time. Sure the time and energy could be used to something more interesting or useful but it’s something still. It’s kinda the same to say ”i spent 5 hours writing a post on the boards” or ”i spent 5 hours cleaning my apartment fully”. As long as there’s some kind of thing there to show that you actually managed to do something and you don’t look at it and go ”Well, that was a waste of time.”, i think it’s worth the effort. Still a whole lot of time, or should i say space to write about stuff. Should i take this thing to some kind of a track, talk about something that actually is about something. Like DaoC, music, sports or should i keep it as it is. Along ramble about random stuff to fill a post. I think i’ll lean towards the later, some might say it’s a wrong choice but if there’s one person out there, just one, who reads all this and finds it amusing, a good way to spend a moment in peace, it’s worth it. Maybe those who read this will find soething out of it, afterall with 40000 marks there’s bound to be atleast two wise words in there. Even if the words are just the words ”wise words”. By all laws of random words put together it has to happen. Read a bad book and there’s atleast one line there that’ll make you think, laugh or move you in another way. Funny part about this is that some wiseass will quote me on the whole thing. Just to be funny. Actually there are alot of things that will happen. Can’t be arsed to read all that. Postfarm. +1. The full quote thing. All the regular stuff will happen. Also a funny part is that it will probably take about 15 minutes max to read all this when the writing of it takes a whole lot more. Work for an hour and get a minutes worth of pay they say. Guess it works like in the movies, in a whole days shoot they get 3 minutes of material for a movie. Oh, for those interested in how we are doing and how big the counter is at the moment. It’s nearing the magic marker, the point of no return, the one point where i realise i have to do this all the way.