Bad taste The Bad Taste Joke Thread

Zarjazz

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better be careful, already been one person arrested for jokes about the incident!

I had to check that out. Turns out the tweet was

"So a bin lorry has apparently driven in 100 people in Glasgow eh, probably the most trash it's picked up in one day."

Which frankly,
isn't even that funny, @Gwadien's is much better :)

The tweet is hardly offensive but you have to be an idiot to post it on a public site.
 

Gwadien

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To be fair, you could easily say what I said completely innocently.
 

Moriath

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There have always been loads of bad jokes after disasters.

I think people are getting confused with law and the right not to have any one offend you.

Taking offence over something doesn't mean that the person should be arrested or charged.

Inciting things to take place that are against the law I see fine ok.

But to post a joke like the above, either gwadiens or the tweet shouldn't go anywhere near a police involvement.
 

Scouse

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I think people are getting confused with law and the right not to have any one offend you........

.......Inciting things to take place that are against the law I see fine ok..
Speech is either free or it is restricted.

Morons think there's a mythical 'balance' to be had.

Say what you like, 'incite' what you like - it's peoples *personal responsibility* if they are dumb enough to do what you say.

The laws that have been passed were exactly for this sort of thing - criminalising people who make poor taste comments that the masses find offensive.

Objectors to these laws are called tin foil hatters. But they have been right all along.
 

TdC

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tbh I've heard that people are getting absolute hell for some jokes after Glasgow.
 

BloodOmen

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A pizza man was found dead in his car last night, covered in olives, pepperoni, cheese and garlic.
Police think he's topped himself.
 

Job

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I suppose that's bad taste if were to actually eat him as a pizza.
 

Wij

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Jimmy Savile, Rolf Harris and Stuart Hall walk into in Irish bar and the barman says,

"Bejaysus! Not Yewtree again!"
 

BloodOmen

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A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can have whatever he wants, provided that his mother-in-law gets double. The man thinks for a moment and then says, "Ok, give me a million pounds and beat me half to death."
 

TdC

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My humorous brother sends another email:


An engineer was crossing a road one day, when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess."

He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it in his pocket.

The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn back into a beautiful princess and stay with you for one week."

The engineer took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.

The frog then cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want."

Again, the engineer took the frog out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess and that I'll stay with you for one week and do anything you want. Why won't you kiss me?"

The engineer said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog - now that's cool."
 

CorNokZ

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Was sitting at a red light in my car when this black guy rolls up next to me in his fancy open sports car. He starts revving his engine like crazy and yells "race, motherfucker!?"

"White", I replied and rolled off
 

Gwadien

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Do not click on the spoiler unless you promise you won't get upset by it.

What's the difference between German trains and German planes?

German trains get to the destination before killing the cargo
 

Raven

Fuck the Tories!
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I bought a German phone the other day... when I put it into airplane mode it locked me out and crashed.
 

BloodOmen

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A driver is pulled over by a policeman. The policeman approaches the drivers door.

"Is there a problem, Officer?"

The policeman says, "Sir, you were speeding. Can I see your license please?"

The driver responds, "I'd give it to you but I don't have one."

"You don't have one?"

The man responds, "I lost it four times for drink driving."

The policeman is shocked. "I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers please?"

"I'm sorry, I can't do that."

The policeman says, "Why not?"

"I stole this car."

The officer says, "Stole it?"

The man says, "Yes, and I killed the owner."

At this point the officer is getting irate. "You what?"

"She's in the boot if you want to see."

The Officer looks at the man and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes, five police cars show up, surrounding the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half-drawn gun.

The senior officer says, "Sir, could you step out of your vehicle please!"

The man steps out of his vehicle. "Is there a problem, sir?"

"One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner."

"Murdered the owner?"

The officer responds, "Yes, could you please open the boot of your car please?"

The man opens the boot, revealing nothing but an empty boot.

The officer says, "Is this your car sir?"

The man says, "Yes" and hands over the registration papers.

The officer, understandably, is quite stunned. "One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving licence."

The man digs in his pocket revealing a wallet and hands it to the officer. The officer opens the wallet and examines the licence. He looks quite puzzled. "Thank you, sir. One of my officers told me you didn't have a licence, stole this car, and murdered the owner."

The man replies, "I bet you the lying bastard told you I was speeding, too!"
 

TdC

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My sexy brother sends:





Fred and Fiona were making passionate love in Fred's Transit van when suddenly Fiona ( being a bit on the kinky side) yells out:

"Oh, fat boy, whip me, whip me!"

Fred, not wanting to pass up this unique opportunity, obviously did not have any whips to hand, but in a flash of inspiration, opened the window, snaps the antenna off his van and proceeds to whip Fiona until they both collapse in sado-masochistic ecstasy.

About a week later, Fiona notices that the marks left by the whipping session are not healing and starting to fester a bit so she goes to the doctor.

The doctor takes one look at the wounds and asks: "Did you get these marks having sex?"

Fiona a little too embarrassed that she had even slept with Fred let alone allowed him to indulge in her own kinky desires, eventually admits that, "Yes, I did."

Nodding his head knowingly, the doctor exclaims: "I thought so, because in all my years as a doctor, you've got the worst case of van-aerial disease that I've ever seen."


:(
 

Edmond

Is now wearing thermals.....Brrrrr
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My sexy brother sends:





Fred and Fiona were making passionate love in Fred's Transit van when suddenly Fiona ( being a bit on the kinky side) yells out:

"Oh, fat boy, whip me, whip me!"

Fred, not wanting to pass up this unique opportunity, obviously did not have any whips to hand, but in a flash of inspiration, opened the window, snaps the antenna off his van and proceeds to whip Fiona until they both collapse in sado-masochistic ecstasy.

About a week later, Fiona notices that the marks left by the whipping session are not healing and starting to fester a bit so she goes to the doctor.

The doctor takes one look at the wounds and asks: "Did you get these marks having sex?"

Fiona a little too embarrassed that she had even slept with Fred let alone allowed him to indulge in her own kinky desires, eventually admits that, "Yes, I did."

Nodding his head knowingly, the doctor exclaims: "I thought so, because in all my years as a doctor, you've got the worst case of van-aerial disease that I've ever seen."


:(



The old ones are.....old
 

TdC

Trem's hunky sex love muffin
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my bro's 20 years older than I am, so........45.
 

BloodOmen

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Army sniper walks into a rifle shop to buy a new scope for his rifle.

Manager takes out one and says "This scope is so good, YOU can see my house 1 km up on that hill."

Sniper looks through the scope and laughs: "I see a naked man and a naked woman in your house."

Manager looks in the scope and gives the sniper 2 bullets: "I'll give you this scope for free if you shoot my wife in the head and blow that guys cock off."

Sniper looks again...: "Well, I can do that with 1 bullet."
 

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