SPAM random annoying things

[Scouse]

I literally don't understand a word of what you're on about there @Raven. Other than you don't like a vegan, who whilst admittedly annoying (like all evangelistic vegans) still probably has a lower carbon footprint / higher ethical food standard than the vast majority of us.

 

[Raven]

Um... I think the clue is in the first few words.

But...OK.

 

[Scouse]

Um... I think the clue is in the first few words.

But...OK.

I mean - what's this cat shit coffee and battery farmed civets?

 

[dysfunction]

I mean - what's this cat shit coffee and battery farmed civets?

There is a coffee that comes from the shit of a cat. The cat eats coffee bean shits it out and they make coffee from it.
But apparently the cats are battery farmed and not free range.

 

[georgie]

that cat shit coffee, the stuff that those weird little civet things make by eating, then shitting out.

the stuff is actually pretty much battery farmed in stinking shit hole countries

Seems pretty self explanatory to me.

No fucking clue why someone would want to drink it, but there we go.

 

[Zarjazz]

So fucking clue why someone would want to drink it, but there we go.

Because Kopi Luwak coffee is regarded as the best tasting in the world by some people. That could just be poncy hipster bullshit (pun intended) but it also often comes top in blind taste tests so who the fuck knows.

 

[Raven]

My cats shit makes my eyes water, a mixture if wild food and chemo medication, thankfully he only shits inside on rare occasions. Why or how someone thought it would be a good idea in the first place to go looking for shat out coffee berries and see what they tasted like when boiled up is beyond me.

 

[Bodhi]

It's because, many scitentists over the ages have proved that a lack of bacon in your diet sends you fucking insane. This insanity leads to thinking coffee would taste better if a cat has shat it out it's arse.

 

[DaGaffer]

It's because, many scitentists over the ages have proved that a lack of bacon in your diet sends you fucking insane. This insanity leads to thinking coffee would taste better if a cat has shat it out it's arse.

Evidence. All of Islam. QED.

 

[Scouse]

Evidence. All of Islam. QED.

Don't forget the kosher

 

[Zarjazz]

lack of bacon in your diet sends you fucking insane.

Evidence. All of Islam. QED.

Don't forget the kosher

Nice, FH has just solved the Middle East problem. We just need to carpet bomb bacon sarnies instead of actual bombs and we're all good.

 

[old.user4556]

1. Draw picture of Mohammed on the side of a bacon roll van
2. Call it More-ham-head
3. Fix middle east crisis
4. Prophet?

 

[Raven]

Just tell them its halal turkey bacon or some shit. They when they have told you how nice it was reveal the truth.

Watch the funny beards get shaved off quicker than a snackbar fleeing Mosul.

 

[old.user4556]

Open up a joint called "Allah's Snackbar". Flaming IED burger with topped extra crispy bacon insurgents.

 

[CorNokZ]

1. Build a wall around the Middle East (maybe out of sun cells, like a brilliant man suggested for another similar construction)
2. "yes, you can go in. No, you cannot leave"
3. Let snack bars enjoy the caliphate in peace
4. Israel.. You on your own now
5. Black out the middle east on all world maps
6. Wake up and realise you were in @Job's dream

 

[Raven]

Trump is good at building walls, someone should ask him to sort it out.

 

[Tom]

I was in Abu Dhabi a few years back. At breakfast, in the hotel, they only had white chicken sausages. I asked a waiter if they had any pork sausages.

He just kind of looked at me and slowly shook his head. I felt like a right twat.

Those sausages were properly shit though.

 

[old.user4556]

Should have asked him if they sold Flinstones sausages, when he shook his head you should have said "oh Dubai don't have them either, but I thought Abu Dhabi do".

 

[Raven]

Get given a range rover for the week.

Find out its an automatic.

Nope.

 

[old.user4556]

I love automatics.

 

[Scouse]

Last day of contract today. Extension is on the agency's system. Just needs authorising.

Everyone who can do that is off.

 

[DaGaffer]

Get given a range rover for the week.

Find out its an automatic.

Nope.

Do they even do a manual Range Rover? Doubt it.

 

[caLLous]

I think the 8 speed auto is the only option.

 

[Raven]

I have no idea. Its a lease we have left over so not really got any choice in it.

 

[DaGaffer]

I have no idea. Its a lease we have left over so not really got any choice in it.

I like Range Rovers. Think the new Velar is very nice indeed for an SUV

 

[Raven]

Yeah, I like them, never really thought whether they were all autos though. Is that for the American market or something? I would have thought a manual would be better for offroad, with clutch control and whatnot, never driven one before.

*not that many get used for rough terrain I imagine.

 

[old.user4556]

Yeah, I like them, never really thought whether they were all autos though. Is that for the American market or something? I would have thought a manual would be better for offroad, with clutch control and whatnot, never driven one before.

*not that many get used for rough terrain I imagine.

A lot of automagics are better on CO2, so they're increasingly more popular with the fleet market. Modern sporty autos are also much quicker at changing gears than we are, so their 0-60 times are better (plus launch control).

The debate about driver involvement is another thing. I've got the option of full auto (great for stop / start traffic on the commute) and full manual flappy paddle mode for the sporty drives.


View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZYP_i7yDCH4

 

[DaGaffer]

Yeah, I like them, never really thought whether they were all autos though. Is that for the American market or something? I would have thought a manual would be better for offroad, with clutch control and whatnot, never driven one before.

*not that many get used for rough terrain I imagine.

All the terrain response gubbins is designed to work with the auto box, so its doing all the clutch work for you. I don't even think you have separate locking diffs or low range transfer boxes on Rangies, its all done by software. Seems to work though as they still have the reputation as the SUVs you can still actually use off-road. I wouldn't take a BMW X5 on wet grass (literally - I've been in one on wet grass and it didn't go well).

 

[sayward]

Ear infection. Never had one before. Bloody agony all week.Why?

 

[dysfunction]

Had a few ear infections. Last one was when 9/11 occurred. I'm now partially deaf in one ear.

I blame al-Qaeda...