I hate telemarketing

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Testin da Cable

Guest
...been phoned twice tonight fs AND I'm supposed to have a fecking unlisted number heh :eek:

telematketeers are right up there with the tax men imo :twak:
 
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old.SunTzu

Guest
Yeah, hate how they always call when i just got some pizza delivered or am sitting down to eat a nice whopper meal from bk(dont cook much) and they always call the second you get ready
 
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throdgrain

Guest
i get many of them at work which drives me mad but i can cope with that as its part of my job.when i sit down for me dinner at home and some cunt rings up trying to sell me the same gas supply with a different name it drives me MAD!or they ring up sunday morning! jeesus! u can always tell cos they start with-
"hello my names <insert name> and id like to talk to you about...)
they actually read from scripts you know.how do i know this? well i been in sales many years,i actually sold sky tv when it came out.well,at least it was original then...:)
 
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djpringle

Guest
I don't know what it is but every 3-4 months they become the scourge of my life and this time the be nice and polite voice is starting to go.
 
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Moving Target

Guest
I say strange stuff to them like

'Sure, i'll check it...OH MY GOD! THERE's A F£$KING SPACE MONSTER!! ARGH!' *put phone down* :)
 
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throdgrain

Guest
when im at work they actually open with the line "can i speak to the person who makes the decisions on advertising please"
what a givaway,they dont know who i am,so it must be a cold call.sometimes i just say "no".theres a pause then some of them say why? and i say ,"cos i dontwant to talk to you".they put the phone down.no doubt giving me a right slagging lol.
 
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old.Jas

Guest
I enjoy saying -

"Yes! I was looking at that service/product, but hang on one second - I have to take the eggs/veg/kettle off the boil in the kitchen"

Then you place the phone on the table and carry on watching TV/Playing CS/eating. Hang up the phone 15 mins later
 
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Testin da Cable

Guest
the poor girl on the last call had such a bad cold awwww. I almost didn't have to heart to tell her to kill herself by inhaling burning molten plastic :eek:
 
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Moving Target

Guest
Originally posted by Jas
I enjoy saying -

"Yes! I was looking at that service/product, but hang on one second - I have to take the eggs/veg/kettle off the boil in the kitchen"

Then you place the phone on the table and carry on watching TV/Playing CS/eating. Hang up the phone 15 mins later
Click to expand...

Thats what my uncle did :)
 
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djpringle

Guest
obviously something you can relate to



not the plastic bit of course
 
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Testin da Cable

Guest
aye, that's why I just 'thought' it ;)
sometimes I have real loud thoughts :D
 
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Summo

Guest
When I were a lad...

Heh heh. Before I got a proper job I used to sell double-glazing on the phone. :D Well, sell the idea that it would be great for the world to have an engineer (not a salesperson, mind!) call to give an estimate. The idea being that I would chat for a bit, get an 'okay' then ring the bell on the wall. Really.

Best job I've ever had. :) I got to sit in a room with other peeps of a similar age, have a laugh, smoke endless cigarettes, eat chocolate or fudge brownies and drink coffee. Only worked between 10am and 1pm then back for 5pm to 8pm. Being in the centre of town I was well placed to meet me mates in the pub. Chuffing great. :D

There is a script which is pinned to the wall in front of you. N00bs read from it but after a while you embelish it, drop bits add bits, invent whole new sub-plots, promotions... anything to get that 'okay' out of them. Once you got that, a 'supervisor' (a kid only a year or so older than me) would phone them back to confirm the appointment. If they were still saying 'okay' you'd sold them the idea, they became a 'hot lead' and you got an extra £3 on top of your hourly rate. After three hot leads in a session you got paid £5 for each of them. After five you got £7 for each and so on. If a proper salesman then managed to actually get these poor mugs to sign on the line then they'd usually give you a cut of their commission, or an equivalent gift. Got a VHS player for that once.

Once you got into the swing of it it became remarkably easy to get an 'okay'. A favourite approach of mine was to tell people it was the end of the season, we weren't making any new stock for now, nor looking to make proper sales and that at the moment we wanted houses with our windows in to take photographs for next season's brochure. Consequently we'd be looking to sell the windows at a little over trade prices to assist in our advertising. You could make it sound like we were all working together - that we were all on the same side.

I'd ask them whereabouts in the street their house was situated, then get really excited about the answer as though it was exactly what we were looking for. If it's on a corner, 'great! two street of traffic!' If it's in the middle of the street, 'wonderful! You're house will really stand out against the others in the picture!' if it's right at the bottom of a muddy cul-de-sac that nobody visits due to the piles of rotten corpses, 'superb! the rural look really sells in the city!'.

It's amazing how many people atually say 'yes' to these things. Everyone talks about saying fuck off and hanging up but I was usually getting between 4 and 9 leads every three-hour session. I wasn't the best, but in the top three.

Anyway... long post buta valuable insight into the wor of telesales. It's a lot of fun and very lucrative if you're able to talk, relate to people and act a bit.


/edit Also, it makes no difference if you're listed in the phone book or not. We never, ever used the phone book. The company (as do many others) paid BT (and prolly Telewest, NTL, Cable & Wireless these days) a large amount of money to be regularly sent a huge list of all the phone numbers, names and addresses of everybody in the UK. If you have a phone, many, many companies have your details.
 
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Testin da Cable

Guest
glad I never had you on the phone Summo matey :)
 
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old.Reverend Flatus

Guest
I filled out a form to be shot of all this cold calling bollocks, I think it was the telephone preference service or some such thing. Seems to have cured the problem. I get the occasional call but I usually reply "You do realise I subscribe to the telephone preference service to avoid this sort of call?" which usually cuts 'em dead :cool:
 
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Will

Guest
Telephone Preference Scheme - 0845 070 0707

Once you are listed, you shouldn't receive any more sales calls.

And I have an amazing wav of a BT telesales call that went oh so wrong - send me a private message and I'll send it to you tonight.
 
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old.plightstar

Guest
I've worked as a telesales person, for two days once, and I had to quit cause the amount of abuse I was taking, plus its a boring job, very boring.
 
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Wij

Guest
Originally posted by ItchyTrigaFinga
Telephone Preference Scheme - 0845 070 0707

Once you are listed, you shouldn't receive any more sales calls.

And I have an amazing wav of a BT telesales call that went oh so wrong - send me a private message and I'll send it to you tonight.
Click to expand...

The geordie one ? Heard it :)
 
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Will

Guest
Originally posted by Wij


The geordie one ? Heard it :)
Click to expand...
And isn't it funny "You can stick this phone up your pissing arse" We use it for training in our call centre - teaches them how bad things could be.:D
 
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gremlin

Guest
Do what they did on Seinfeld once..

(phone rings)
Jerry: "Hello?"

Telemarketer: "Hi! I'm calling to see if I can tell you about ways to save on long distance telephone calls?"

Jerry: "Actually, I don't have time to talk right now, but why don't you give me your home number and i'll call you back later to talk about it?"

Telemarketer: "I'm sorry Sir, I can't do that"

Jerry: "Oh, what? You don't want people calling you at home? WELL NOW YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL!"

*click*
 
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