Zombie Holocaust. What would you do?

[SAS]

Picture the scene... (If you've seen the remake of the Dawn of the Dead then you are already there).

You wake up and rub your sleepy eyes. After a nice warm cuppa you turn on the telly and yawn, coming face to face with news on every channel. The nightmare has become reality, zombies are everywhere, it's Day 1 and you are sat there in your room when you hear your front door being pounded again and again...

What would you do? Where would you go? Where would you hide?

Try to keep this in the realms of reality. I.e you would produce a shotgun out of thin air .

It's a bit of research for a book I'm starting to write, which I want to be factual, but need to find out what other people would do in this situation.

 

[kanonfodda]

Thinking rationally, I would get together some food, clothes sleeping bag. Pick up some of the wood from my back garden (make shift weapon) and get to my car.

From there, I would head to my parents/friends places, get as many people together as possible, with as many vehicles. then get the hell out of dodge.

I would get ideas from everyone on where to go, and head for the most defensable position.

I don't know if I would do that, but its what I like to think I would do

 

[Mobius]

Shit My Pants.

 

[gunner440]

run off to your friends house 2 or so blocks away from you and you find he has the same problem

then you cough team up cough and try to find a way out of the situation ;D

how corny eh

 

[Tom]

Depends, if they're the 'brains..brains....' kind of zombies, then I'd jump in the car and run them down.

If they're the 28 days later kind of zombies (ok not zombies I know), then I'd hijack a boat and fuckoff out to sea.

 

[old.Tohtori]

Pick up my cellular, call my bro and ask if he's a f**king zombie yet?

Ok, if not, i'd take the strange metal pole i grabbed on one of my drunken trips across the city, kick the door open(it opens out and stupid zombies are trying to bash it in).

First ugly face i see, i bash and then head for the neighbor store.

One quick bash through the window with the metal pole and i just upgraded my metal pole to two katanas.(lucky to live next to a authentic oriental weaponry store).

Then i would head over to my bro, keeping those nasty buggers at bay with a few swings of ye old katana and a few throwing axes/knives/stars.

Now, IF i manage to reach halfway to my bro, i'd go through the window of a weaponstore. Now i'm ready, shotgun, katana and the same pair for my bro. Grab a few halfautomatic weapons too and voila.

IF i reach my bro's house(my chances are quite good now), we'd gear up and head for the military warehouses that they have scattered across the city(seen those metal doors in strange places, like the side of a bridge or in solid stone?). That place has more firepower and supplies to last a lifetime.

Now the training begins, get into gear, go out and find survivors, bring back. Try and try again until the people learn how to use military equipment.(luckily most of the men in finland are trained in warfare since it's mandatory).

Then blast the zombies to kingdom come!

Ofcourse, this all depends on if i get across the street to the oriental weapons store. If that first metalpole hit misses, i'll be sucking brains faster then i can say Willy wonka.

*nods*

 

[dysfunction]

I'd build an impenetrable self sufficient fortress...

And then nuke the rest of the planet.

 

[Jonaldo]

Depends, if they're the 'brains..brains....' kind of zombies

Well I'd be safe then I would just wander amongst them, pick the best looking female zombie and ask her out.

If they are just evil killer zombies from space hell intent on destruction then I'd just try and travel as fast as possible from place to place, trying to avoid them all whilst trying to find a safe haven somewhere (to settle down with my nice female zombie)

 

[Wij]

I'd go on a looting spree.

 

[pcg79]

yep straight down the the ferrari dealership

 

[Bullitt]

I'd open the door say something like 'Fuck off, i don't want the Big Issue, haven't had an accident or want double glazing' then slam the door and realise two hours later that

a) there were alot of salesmen/hobos there today
b) they looked healthier
c) normally they ask for 48pence to get to darlington not 'brains' although admittedly they need both.

 

[nath]

I guess I'd try and head to the nearest military base because, chances are, they'd be alright and have a nice secure place set up.

 

[Cyfr]

I'd kill myself

 

[Cdr]

I'd goto the local police station, grab myself a gun and go kill all my ex-school teachers, people who I dislike, and general arseholes (zombies or not, they'd all get it).

Then its a small trip to the local airport, grab a plane and fly my ass outta there

 

[Healer McHeal]

well, id grab my baseball bat, head to my cuboard and get my 2 rifles,
then go and see who was still alive that i knew, go to the little shop right near my house, get a bottle of vodka, down it.

while pissed go an mass zombie killing spree and hope i dont run out of ammo otherwise my bat is gonna get alot of use

 

[Teren]

hmmm.....

take my mobile, and call an escort service, let them in thru the window (i live on the groud floor) and die from the zombies while having 7 big boobed women shagging me...

 

[Healer McHeal]

well, id grab my baseball bat, head to my cuboard and get my 2 rifles,
then go and see who was still alive that i knew, go to the little shop right near my house, get a bottle of vodka, down it.

while pissed go an mass zombie killing spree and hope i dont run out of ammo otherwise my bat is gonna get alot of use

ok, i wanna add more

id steal a nice fast car, drive down to my dads, grab all the stuff we would need, jump on one of his coaches, and drive the fuck to an airport, jump on a plane, (my dad can fly one ^^), fly out to some uninhabited island and start building houses etc, and live there till the whole thing was over.

(forgot to mention, take as many alive people as u see with u on the coach/plane)

 

[babs]

Haven't seen the remake yet, but the original is one of my favourite films. Based on my knowledge of zombie portrayal from films I think I'd just walk about, but slightly faster than normal, that ought to keep them at bay.

 

[Tom]

I'd kill myself

oh nice one, now you've just created more problems for the rest of us

 

[GekuL]

Based on my knowledge of zombie portrayal from films I think I'd just walk about, but slightly faster than normal, that ought to keep them at bay.

Yeah, that's the thing. In these films they always play to the zombies strengths and stay in one place.
A zombie apocolypse is one of the few occasions that a 4x4 would be useful in the city, would be fun as long as you didn't run in to anyone you knew

The 28 days later zombies are the ones to be scared of though.

 

[Jonaldo]

Changing subject a little, after seeing the word 'zombie' appear quite a few times lately I started wondering about the word. Anyone know where it comes from? Is it just slang or is it a real 'official' term for undead that have risen from their graves? Is a female zombie a zombette or is it just zombie for all?

Could anyone shed some light on where this word originates from as it sounds like a fairly modern term.

 

[ECA]

I'd laugh because my neighbourhood is granniesville nearly. ( my street isnt but surrounding area primarily fogies ).

I'd pack up the car, drive to the huge safeways about 1 minutes walk away stock up on food then head to the port around 15 mins drive away and steal a speedboat and find an island somewhere with lots of big breasted women.

 

[Jonaldo]

steal a speedboat and find an island somewhere with lots of big breasted women.

Of course! there's loads of them islands about

 

[leggy]

Carmageddon 2: Apocalypse now tbh

Anyway, what's all this nonsense about stealing cars and boats? It's clear that no one else would have thought of this option. yuh.

What I would do is this:

Go out and start killing humans. Because knowing my luck I'd be one of the first zombies :/

 

[scoop]

On here too now huh.. I have to listen to a guy at work talk about what he'd do all day.. So heres his plan!

As he lives near one of the largest tescos, he'd head over there. Hopefully being able to get a load of people to help, he'd start blocking off all doors / windows with parked cars, wood, trolleys etc..

As they'd most likely be in there a long time, and the food would not last forever, they'd grow crops on the roof..

Try listening to that all day, every day, in a much much larger version.

 

[Cyfr]

oh nice one, now you've just created more problems for the rest of us

You trying to summon zombies?

 

[Healer McHeal]

Changing subject a little, after seeing the word 'zombie' appear quite a few times lately I started wondering about the word. Anyone know where it comes from? Is it just slang or is it a real 'official' term for undead that have risen from their graves? Is a female zombie a zombette or is it just zombie for all?

Could anyone shed some light on where this word originates from as it sounds like a fairly modern term.

One belief unique to voodoo is the zombie. The creole word “zombi” is apparently derived from Nzambi, a West African deity but it only came into general use in 1929, after the publication of William B. Seabrook's The Magic Island. In this book, Seabrook recounts his experiences on Haiti, including the walking dead. He describes the first 'zombie' he came across in this way:

"The eyes were the worst. It was not my imagination. They were in truth like the eyes of a dead man, not blind, but staring, unfocused, unseeing. The whole face, for that matter, was bad enough. It was vacant, as if there was nothing behind it. It seemed not only expressionless, but incapable of expression."

Haitian zombies were once normal people, but underwent zombification by a "bokor" or voodoo sorcerer, through spell or potion. The victim then dies and becomes a mindless automaton, incapable of remembering the past, unable to recognise loved ones and doomed to a life of miserable toil under the will of the zombie master.

There have been some rare occasions of juju zombies temporarily regaining part of their mental faculties. This rare occurrence has only been observed when a zombie encounters situations that have heavy emotional connections to their mortal lives.

There are many examples of zombies in modern day Haiti. Papa Doc Duvallier the dictator of Haiti from 1957 to 1971 had a private army of thugs called tonton macoutes. These people were said to be in trances and they followed every command that Duvallier gave them. Duvallier had also his own voodoo church with many followers and he promised to return after his death to rule again. He did not come back but a guard was placed at his tomb, to insure that he would not try to escape, or that nobody steal the body. There are also many stories of people that die, then many years later return to the shock and surprise of relatives. A man named Caesar returned 18 years after he died to marry, have three children and die again, 30 years after he was originally buried. Another case involved a student from a village Port-au-Prince who had been shot in a robbery attempt. Six months later, the student returned to his parent’s house as a zombie. At first it was possible to talk with the man, and he related the story of his murder, a voodoo witch doctor stealing his body from the ambulance before he reached hospital and his transformation into a zombie. As time went on, he became unable to communicate, he grew more and more lethargic and died.

A case reported a writer named Stephen Bonsal described a zombie he witnessed in 1912 in this way: a man had at intervals a high fever, he joined a foreign mission church and the head of the mission saw the him die. He assisted at the funeral and saw the dead man buried. Some days later the supposedly dead man was found dressed in grave clothes, tied to a tree, moaning. The poor wretch soon recovered his voice but not his mind. He was indentifed by his wife, by the physician who had pronounced him dead, and by the clergyman. The victim did not recognized anybody, and spent his days moaning inarticulate words.

taken from a site some where

 

[Munkey]

take all the food i have, my tent, sleeping bag and go up to my roof. Then try to call people on my cell. When i get hungry i'd risk a raid of a nearby corner shop for food.

(I'm taking it that the zombies cant climb the ladder at the side of my house)

For protection i'd use a steel bar probably, long and heavy so that they cant get too close and they also get a good whacking. all the houses in my area are joined by walls so i can walk along the top of them to get around and escape the clutches of the zombies. If they could climb ladders and stuff, i'd run out the backdoor, into the landrover and head out into deep desert. Use car for shelter, raid passing petrol station on the way for petrol and the likes.

Tbh, if everyone else was a zombie. And i had to live in a world like that...i'd kill myself.

That said, if i could last a year or two, surely the zombies would die from hunger or something?

But priorities are a) food b) shelter c) inaccesible locations that zombies, being the mindless buggers they are, cant get to.

Providing my cell doesnt run out of credit and the local repeater stations arent destroyed, then I'd make it my priority to get into contact with family first to try and save them, then friends. Bugger everyone else.

I think I think about this too much

 

[Munkey]

On here too now huh.. I have to listen to a guy at work talk about what he'd do all day.. So heres his plan!

As he lives near one of the largest tescos, he'd head over there. Hopefully being able to get a load of people to help, he'd start blocking off all doors / windows with parked cars, wood, trolleys etc..

As they'd most likely be in there a long time, and the food would not last forever, they'd grow crops on the roof..

Try listening to that all day, every day, in a much much larger version.

Wouldnt like that, claustraphobic area, no change to escape, full of people you dont know/like. Theyd start going nuts. Has to be people i know and love.

 

[scoop]

I think I think about this too much

No seriously you dont The guy i mentioned told me today that he "looked out of his window to check everything was normal."

See what these films do to people!? Ban!!!!11