You know you have hit 30 when......

evzy

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
2,482
1. You leave clubs before the end to "beat the rush".
2. You get more excited about having a roast on a Sunday than going clubbing.
3. You stop dreaming of becoming a professional footballer and start dreaming of having a son who might instead.
4. Before throwing the local paper away, you look through the property section.
5. You prefer Later with Jools Holland to Top of the Pops.
6. All of a sudden, Tony Blair is not 50, he's only 50.
7. Before going out anywhere, you ask what the parking is like.
8. Rather than throw a knackered pair of trainers out, you keep them because they'll be all right for the garden.
9. You buy your first ever T-shirt without anything written on it.
10. Instead of laughing at the innovations catalogue that falls out of the newspaper, you suddenly see both the benefit and money saving properties of a plastic winter cover for your garden bench and an electronic mole repellent for the lawn. Not to mention the plastic man for the car to deter would-be thieves.
11. You start to worry about your parents' health.
12. You complain that ecstasy's "not as pure as it used to be coz you know that if you have some it will take about 48 hours to recover and anyway, you might look a bit of an idiot.
13. Sure, you have more disposable income, but everything you want to buy costs between £200 and £500.
14. You don't get funny looks when you buy a Disney video or a Wallace and Gromit bubble bath, as the sales assistant assumes they are for your child.
15. All Pop music starts to sound crap.
16. You opt for Pizza Express over Pizza Hut because they don't have any pictures on the menus and anyway, they do a really nice half-bottle of house
white.
17. You become powerless to resist the lure of self-assembly furniture.
18. You always have enough milk in.
19. To compensate for the fact that you have little desire to go clubbing, you instead frequent really loud tapas restaurants and franchise pubs with wacky names in the mistaken belief that you have not turned into your parents.
20. While flicking through the TV channels, you happen upon C4's Time Team with Tony Robinson. You get drawn in.
21. The benefits of a pension scheme become clear.
22. You go out of your way to pick up a colour chart from B&Q.
23. You wish you had a shed.
24. You have a shed.
25. You actually find yourself saying "They don't make 'em like that anymore", and "I remember when there were only 3 TV channels", and "Of course in my day...."
26. Radio 2 play more songs you know than Radio 1 -and Johnny Walker has some really interesting guests on.
27. Instead of tutting at old people who take ages to get off the bus, you tut at schoolchildren whose diction is poor.
28. When sitting outside a pub you become envious of their hanging baskets.
29. You make an effort to be in and out of the curry house by 11.
30. You come face to face with your own mortality for the first time and the indestructibility of the 20s gives way to a realisation that you are but passing through this life and if you don't settle down soon and have kids
you'll have no-one to look after you when you're old and frail and incontinent and you can't go on p**sing your life up against a wall forever and think of how many brain cells you're destroying every time a swift half turns into 10 pints, and look at that, a full set of stainless steel saucepans for 99 quid, they cost as much as 35 each if you buy them separately, and you get a milk pan thrown in ...
31. You find yourself saying "Is it cold in here or is it just me?"
 

Cozak

Part of the furniture
Joined
Jan 15, 2004
Messages
2,871
16. You opt for Pizza Express over Pizza Hut because they don't have any
pictures on the menus and anyway, they do a really nice half-bottle of house
white.

Im only 20 and Pizza Express owns pizza hut! Food is so much better, and its nearer the quayside than pizza hut.
 

eggy

Fledgling Freddie
Joined
Feb 3, 2004
Messages
5,283
:eek: I already (sometimes) do the following!

evzy said:
1. You leave clubs before the end to "beat the rush". (well, gigs)
4. Before throwing the local paper away, you look through the property
section.
5. You prefer Later with Jools Holland to Top of the Pops.
7. Before going out anywhere, you ask what the parking is like.
9. You buy your first ever T-shirt without anything written on it.
15. All Pop music starts to sound crap. (most 'pop' music IS crap. if you mean pop in a classical sense)
16. You opt for Pizza Express over Pizza Hut
18. You always have enough milk in.
31. You find yourself saying "Is it cold in here or is it just me?"
 

Rediknight

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Dec 22, 2003
Messages
385
30. You come face to face with your own mortality for the first time and the indestructibility of the 20s gives way to a realisation that you are but passing through this life and if you don't settle down soon and have kids
you'll have no-one to look after you when you're old and frail and incontinent and you can't go on p**sing your life up against a wall forever and think of how many brain cells you're destroying every time a swift half turns into 10 pints...

true, true... :(
 

tris-

Failed Geordie and Parmothief
Joined
Jan 2, 2004
Messages
15,260
i do quite a lot of those things already,
 

Haggus

Can't get enough of FH
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
1,075
2. You get more excited about having a roast on a Sunday than going clubbing.
8. Rather than throw a knackered pair of trainers out, you keep them because they'll be all right for the garden.
10. Instead of laughing at the innovations catalogue that falls out of the newspaper, you suddenly see both the benefit and money saving properties of a plastic winter cover for your garden bench and an electronic mole repellent for the lawn. Not to mention the plastic man for the car to deter would-be thieves.
14. You don't get funny looks when you buy a Disney video or a Wallace and Gromit bubble bath, as the sales assistant assumes they are for your child.
21. The benefits of a pension scheme become clear.
22. You go out of your way to pick up a colour chart from B&Q.
26. Radio 2 play more songs you know than Radio 1 -and Johnny Walker has some really interesting guests on.
28. When sitting outside a pub you become envious of their hanging baskets.
29. You make an effort to be in and out of the curry house by 11.
30. You come face to face with your own mortality for the first time and the indestructibility of the 20s gives way to a realisation that you are but passing through this life and if you don't settle down soon and have kids
you'll have no-one to look after you when you're old and frail and incontinent and you can't go on p**sing your life up against a wall forever and think of how many brain cells you're destroying every time a swift half turns into 10 pints, and look at that, a full set of stainless steel saucepans for 99 quid, they cost as much as 35 each if you buy them separately, and you get a milk pan thrown in ...

Everything else I do :(
 

Lamp

Gold Star Holder!!
Joined
Jan 16, 2005
Messages
23,270
Excellent post
Very true
Particularly the first one

Hehe
 

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