Worst joke ever attempts

[kirennia]

No rules, just post the worst you've heard. I'll try get the ball rolling and I apologise in advance.

1.The dirtiest joke in the world follows. I'm talking really really dirty. I'd personally suggest, if you get offended by any dirty profanities, anything to do with race, this would be especially harsh for you. I hope the mods can see it in their hearts to not boot me from the forums for posting such a harshly dirty joke. It really is pure filth in its worst form You can't say you haven't been warned...

Spoiler

Three white horses ran through a muddy puddle!

2.You hear the one about the extractor fan?

Spoiler

He used to like tractors, now he don't

3.What did the mexican fire chief call his two sons?

Spoiler

(say out loud)Hosea and Hoseb

 

[NikonL]

don't get the first one. i wish i didn't get either of the others.

 

[swords]

Its a dirty joke... ofc.

 

[Thadius]

You are getting a negative rep for those monstrosoties

 

[old.Tohtori]

I could tell a few, but i'd be arrested for them for sure.

 

[kirennia]

You are getting a negative rep for those monstrosoties

Is strange, didn't know you could negative rep people. Funny thing is, it's come up in my 'rep' bar as a red bubble yet I think my rep points have gone up...lol. I couldn't be certain though, I don't check them often, heh. More jokes please!

Ahh, just found out why, ignore this

 

[swords]

I could tell a few, but i'd be arrested for them for sure.

Spoiler it then

 

[CorNokZ]

Why did Micky Mouse go out in space?

Spoiler

To find Pluto

 

[Thadius]

Why did Micky Mouse go out in space?

Spoiler

To find Pluto

Where is Pluto?

Its not a planet anymore

 

[CorNokZ]

Where is Pluto?

Its not a planet anymore

iirc that little blue one farthest away is called Pluto? If not.. My joke was REALLY shitty

 

[kirennia]

Why did Micky Mouse go out in space?

Spoiler

To find Pluto

lol, old but classic

 

[Naetha]

What's got two legs and bleeds?

Spoiler

Half a dog

 

[pikeh]

Spoiler

phoned up my local swimming pool the other day. i said "is this my local swimming pool?". guy on the other end goes "depends where your calling from"

Spoiler

A Man walked into a psychiatrists wearing clingfilm for shorts.
The shrink says "well i can clearly see your nuts"

 

[pikeh]

Spoiler

A man goes to a doctors. "ive got a cricket ball stuck up my backside"
"hows that?"
"Dont you start"

 

[Overdriven]

What do you call postman pat on the dol?

Spoiler

pat

 

[Logi]

2 men are walking on the street, 1 man asks: can i walk in the middle

:<

 

[pikeh]

alrighty here goes....

Spoiler

A man gets onto a plane. He takes his seat, and realises hes sitting next to a gorgeous woman. Soon they are talking away, and he asks her what she does for a living. "oh, thats why im on the plane actually. Im going to a conference for nymphomaniacs". "blimey" the guy thinks. Here he is sitting next to a gorgeous sex addict.
"actually, theres a lot of misconceptions in todays society" the girl says. "people often assume afro-american guys are the most well endowed. However, research tells us that its Native americans that possess this trait. Also, instead of the French, the Greeks are known to be the best lovers. Its also Irishmen that are thought to be the most romantice and thoughtful". The girl stops talking and blushes. "oh im sorry. I shouldnt be talking to you about this... I dont even know your name..."














the guy turns to her "Tonto Papadopolous, but my friends call me Paddy".

Im sorry :<

 

[Solo]

I don't understand this thread.

Are the jokes just ment to be terrible, or they ment to be absolutely brutal?

 

[pikeh]

What do you call postman pat on the dol?

insta 50 pat

 

[Amanita]

*

Spoiler

Whats the definition of cruel?

Strap dynamite to the bottom of a wheelchair and tell the occupant to "leg it"

Spoiler

Whats the definition of revenge?

A bastard in a durex factory with a pin

* Jokes subject to inaccuracy due to memory failure.