K
khaldhor
Guest
Found this one on the critshot forums, its a bit long but im bored
at work so
Announcer: Its time for Trials of Atlantis! The quiz show thats worth realm poin..er...um, horizontal skill enhancements!
Announcer: and now, here's your host! Felix Drebeck!
Felix: Good evening, and welcome to the Trials of Atlantis! I'm your host, Felix Drebeck.
Felix: Tonight's contestants, representing their respective realms, are Elstarianna GimmeringStarveil of Hibernia, Sir Argus of Albion, and Thragdor Skullcrush from the frozen lands of Midgard.
(Felixs waves at the board)
Felix: Without further ado, here are tonight's categories.
Felix: Those Silly Hibbies
Felix: Realm vs Realm
Felix: Use Tactics!
Felix: Roleplay?
Felix: Mob Party
Felix: MT!
Felix: Sir Argus, you have the board.
Argus: I'll take MT! for 100g, Felix.
Felix: Answer. These two very similar chat prefixes are often mixed up, with embarressing results.
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: What is /g and /gu?
Felix: That is correct.
Felix: Pick again.
Argus: Use Tactics! for $100.
Felix: Answer. Picture yourself as a Hunter. You've managed to creep up undetected on a Hib caster. What would be the best method of attack?
Elstarianna: (buzz)
Felix: Elstarianna?
Elstarianna: What is spamdoublefrost2win?
Felix: I'm sorry, that is incorrect. Argus or Thragdor?
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: What is spamtehdoublefrost2win!?
Felix: ......no, I'm sorry. Thats incorrect.
Felix: Not every Mid class has Doublefrost.
Argus: ....really?
Elstarianna: Of course they do.
Felix: ....no, no they don't. Right Thragdor?
(Thragdor ponders)
Thragdor: ....Thragdor pretty sure we all got doublefrost...
Felix: .........right.
Felix: Perhaps we should just move on then.
Felix: Argus, the board is still yours.
Argus: Those Silly Hibbies for 100g.
Felix: Answer. Due to the mystical nature of Hibernia, most Hibs tend to have at least some skill in what?
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: Cybering!
Felix: .............
Thragdor: ............
Elstarianna: .......
Felix: No, I'm sorry, thats incorrect. Thragdor or Elstarianna?
Thragdor: (buzz)
Felix: Thragdor?
Thragdor: Dey all make squishy sounds when joo hit dem.
Felix: ....no thats incorrect, and please folks, phrase your answer in the form of a question.
Felix: ........Elstarianna? Did you want to try answering the question?
Elstarianna: ....I was going to say cybering as well.
(Elstarianna blushes)
Felix: ........right. Anyway, the answer was "magic"
Felix: Before we continue, lets take a moment to learn a bit more about our contestants.
(Felix shuffles through his cards)
Felix: Elstarianna, it says here that you were quite the Spraggon hunter in your youth.
Elstarianna: Yep, every day I'd be out there keeping the little buggers in line.
Felix: What kind of Spraggons did you hunt?
Elstarianna: What do you mean? Different kinds?
Felix: Yes, what kinds did you hunt?
Elstarianna: .....there are different kinds?
Felix: Of course, there's all sorts of different kinds.
Elstarianna: ........(breaks down sobbing) THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME!
Felix: No they don't, they're OBVIOUSLY different sizes, and have different names. Its like totally different monsters.
(Elstarianna continues sobbing)
Elstarianna: No they aren't, they're the same, everywhere, everywhere you go. You can't get away from them! (sobs)
Felix: Oh come on, its so obvious they all have different names.They aren't the same creature. Sometimes they're even a different colour!
Elstarianna: Shut up! (sobs)
Argus: Hey hey now, come on, don't cry.
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Elstarianna: Don't touch me!
Argus: Ouchie, heh heh. Oh well. Sorry, I have kinda a weak spot for elven girls.
Thragdor: Dats a girl?
Argus: Er, yes.
(Thragdor hangs his head)
Thragdor: Thragdor can't tell de boy elves from da girl elves.
Argus: Well come on, she's obviously a girl.....*very* obviously. I mean look at those....
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Argus: Ow, hey...
Thragdor: But de boy elves is just as pretty (frowns)
Argus: Heh heh, yeah, thats true...they're attractive in a sort of "Hey you know if you were a girl..." kind of way.
Felix: (cough) Ahem.
Argus: Oh, right, sorry.
Felix: Anyway. Argus, it says here your group once repelled 17 mid groups at once?
Argus: Oh, yeah. BUNKER OF FAITH BABY!
Felix: Surely you can't defeat 17 groups with just Bunker of Faith?
Argus: Duh, n00b, of course you can. BOF2WIN!
Felix: .......
Thragdor: Thrag has trouble choppin through da bunkar....
Elstarianna: Well, it *is* the only way they can win...
Argus: See?! BOOYAH.
Felix: ..........(sigh)
Felix: Thragdor, it says here you once managed to defeat a Lurikeen Hero in one on one combat?
Thragdor: Ya, Thragdor smashed.
Felix: Aren't Lurikeens sort of...I don't know...a heck of a lot smaller then you?
Thragdor: Oh ya, they little....and quick....gotta smash fast. Once Thragdor got one on his leg. Made Thragdor feel real weird cus Thragdor thought it was like....you know when dogs get up on yer leg and start humpin? Ya, like that. But it turn out he was just trynna stab Thragdor.
Felix: ......so anyway, how did you defeat the Hero?
Thragdor: Oh, Thragdor hit em.
Felix: ........and then?
Thragdor: Thragdor hit em more.
Felix: ...........ok right, then what?
Thragdor: Well....den......uh.....lemme see.......oh, Thragdor hit em more.
Felix: ....did you stop hitting him at any point and do something different?
Thragdor: Oh, ya, of course. Thragdor just hit him till he stop movin and gave arpees. Den Thragdor laugh and laugh...
Felix: ......er.
Thragdor: and laugh and laugh, Thragdor sorta forget what he was laughing about. Den Thragdor laughed some more cus that was funny dat Thragdor forgot.
Felix: ...ok lets just play.
Felix: Argus, sadly, the board is still yours.
Argus: Rock!
Argus: I'll take Roleplayers for 100g.
Felix: Answer. When someone with a non-suitable name is spotted, Roleplayers have this option at their disposal.
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: Name Nazi's!
Felix: ...that doesn't even fit the question, plus its not nice to throw around a word like Nazi.
Argus: Quiet! Gameshow Nazi!
Felix: ..........
Felix: Hell with it.
Felix: Elstarianna, you have the board now.
Argus: Dude =[ uncool.
Elstarianna: I'll take Realm vs Realm for 100g, Fe...
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
Elstarianna: STOP THAT!
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Elstarianna: Don't you have some sheep or something you could go bother?!
Argus: Hah, yeah, sheep. The trick with sheep is you have to wait till they bend over, then "pretend" it was the wind that flipped your kilt up, and...er...HEY! I resent that stereotype!
Thragdor: kilt?
Argus: Yeah, kilt. See? This thing.
Thragdor: haw haw, silly Albie. Wearin a man skirt.
Argus: ITS NOT A SKIRT! ITS A KILT! YOU HALF WIT TROLL BASTARD!
Thragdor: he he he, man skirt.
Elstarianna: I slide my warm, delicate hands up and down your hard, lustrous chest....and then I....
Elstarianna: !
Elstarianna: MT!
Argus: .....................
Thragdor: ........
Felix: ..........
Felix: Please refrain from further mt's if at all possible...
Argus: Wait wait, I'd like to hear more of em if at all possible.
Thragdor: Thragdor like stories.
Argus: Me too, buddy, me too.
Felix: (sigh) The board is still yours Elstarianna.
Elstarianna: (cough) ok. I'll take Use Tactics! for 200g then.
Felix: Answer. What is the most effective tool to use in order to take down a keep door?
Elstarianna: (buzz)
Felix: Elstarianna?
Elstarianna: ALARM CLOCK RAID!
Felix: ....er no, that is incorrect. Anyone else?
Thragdor: (buzz)
Felix: Thragdor?
Thragdor: Thrag smash it when no one is awake to fight back.
Felix: ........incorrect. Argus?
Argus: (buzz)
Argus: Dude, Minstrel solo the Lord. Duh.
Felix: For the love a....no, thats incorrect. Elstarianna, you have the board again.
Elstarianna: I'll take Those Silly Hibbies for 200g.
Felix: Answer. Name one item of head gear sold by the hat merchant thats unique to Hibernia.
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: Ivy woven panties.
Felix: ........thats not head gear.
Argus: Not in your dull, boring life perhaps.
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Argus: HEY! What was that for?
Elstarianna: Just because.
Thragdor: Thrag not know what panties are....
Argus: Well, they're like, undergarmets, but...
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Argus: STOP THAT!
Elstarianna: Perv.
Argus: Says the queen of cyber.
(Argus sticks out his tongue at Elstarianna)
(Elstarianna blushs)
Elstarianna: I will hurt you!
Thragdor: Thrag still not know what panties are.
Felix: Ok, come on, stop fighting.
Elstarianna: Quiet you.
Felix: Hey! I'm the host here people.
Elstarianna casts a spell!
Felix is stunned by a barrage of color!
Argus: Ahahaha
Thragdor: Ooooh....purdy colors.
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: Ow, hey. Quit it.
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: Stop that! Seriously, that kinda hurts!
Thragdor:OH! Oh oh oh oh oh! Thrag want to hit something to!
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: Quit it quit it quit it quit it!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor goes into a berzerker rage!
Argus: !
(Argus cheers at Thragdor)
Argus: SPAMTEHDOUBLEFROST2WIN!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Argus: Rock! I didn't know the human jaw could bend that way!
Felix was just killed by Thragdor!
Argus: Oh, wait. Damn dude, you ganked our meal ticket, er, host.
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Argus: .....dude he's already dead, its ok, you can stop now.
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Argus: Oh man, thats just not pretty.
Announcer: Er.....thats all the time we have for tonight folks! Tune in next time!
Argus: Is there a Cleric in the house?
Argus: Dude, c'mon, we need a rez here. Cleric? Anyone? Hell, Paladin? Ghetto rez?
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: I SAID KNOCK IT OFF!
(Rolls Credits)
Argus: Wait wait! I had a 100g! Doesn't that mean I win?
(Roll Credits)
Argus: Where's my 100g!? C'mon, dude. I need a house.
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: DAMMIT! I SAID STOP THAT!
(ROLL CREDITS!)
:lol:
at work so
Announcer: Its time for Trials of Atlantis! The quiz show thats worth realm poin..er...um, horizontal skill enhancements!
Announcer: and now, here's your host! Felix Drebeck!
Felix: Good evening, and welcome to the Trials of Atlantis! I'm your host, Felix Drebeck.
Felix: Tonight's contestants, representing their respective realms, are Elstarianna GimmeringStarveil of Hibernia, Sir Argus of Albion, and Thragdor Skullcrush from the frozen lands of Midgard.
(Felixs waves at the board)
Felix: Without further ado, here are tonight's categories.
Felix: Those Silly Hibbies
Felix: Realm vs Realm
Felix: Use Tactics!
Felix: Roleplay?
Felix: Mob Party
Felix: MT!
Felix: Sir Argus, you have the board.
Argus: I'll take MT! for 100g, Felix.
Felix: Answer. These two very similar chat prefixes are often mixed up, with embarressing results.
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: What is /g and /gu?
Felix: That is correct.
Felix: Pick again.
Argus: Use Tactics! for $100.
Felix: Answer. Picture yourself as a Hunter. You've managed to creep up undetected on a Hib caster. What would be the best method of attack?
Elstarianna: (buzz)
Felix: Elstarianna?
Elstarianna: What is spamdoublefrost2win?
Felix: I'm sorry, that is incorrect. Argus or Thragdor?
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: What is spamtehdoublefrost2win!?
Felix: ......no, I'm sorry. Thats incorrect.
Felix: Not every Mid class has Doublefrost.
Argus: ....really?
Elstarianna: Of course they do.
Felix: ....no, no they don't. Right Thragdor?
(Thragdor ponders)
Thragdor: ....Thragdor pretty sure we all got doublefrost...
Felix: .........right.
Felix: Perhaps we should just move on then.
Felix: Argus, the board is still yours.
Argus: Those Silly Hibbies for 100g.
Felix: Answer. Due to the mystical nature of Hibernia, most Hibs tend to have at least some skill in what?
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: Cybering!
Felix: .............
Thragdor: ............
Elstarianna: .......
Felix: No, I'm sorry, thats incorrect. Thragdor or Elstarianna?
Thragdor: (buzz)
Felix: Thragdor?
Thragdor: Dey all make squishy sounds when joo hit dem.
Felix: ....no thats incorrect, and please folks, phrase your answer in the form of a question.
Felix: ........Elstarianna? Did you want to try answering the question?
Elstarianna: ....I was going to say cybering as well.
(Elstarianna blushes)
Felix: ........right. Anyway, the answer was "magic"
Felix: Before we continue, lets take a moment to learn a bit more about our contestants.
(Felix shuffles through his cards)
Felix: Elstarianna, it says here that you were quite the Spraggon hunter in your youth.
Elstarianna: Yep, every day I'd be out there keeping the little buggers in line.
Felix: What kind of Spraggons did you hunt?
Elstarianna: What do you mean? Different kinds?
Felix: Yes, what kinds did you hunt?
Elstarianna: .....there are different kinds?
Felix: Of course, there's all sorts of different kinds.
Elstarianna: ........(breaks down sobbing) THEY ALL LOOK THE SAME!
Felix: No they don't, they're OBVIOUSLY different sizes, and have different names. Its like totally different monsters.
(Elstarianna continues sobbing)
Elstarianna: No they aren't, they're the same, everywhere, everywhere you go. You can't get away from them! (sobs)
Felix: Oh come on, its so obvious they all have different names.They aren't the same creature. Sometimes they're even a different colour!
Elstarianna: Shut up! (sobs)
Argus: Hey hey now, come on, don't cry.
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Elstarianna: Don't touch me!
Argus: Ouchie, heh heh. Oh well. Sorry, I have kinda a weak spot for elven girls.
Thragdor: Dats a girl?
Argus: Er, yes.
(Thragdor hangs his head)
Thragdor: Thragdor can't tell de boy elves from da girl elves.
Argus: Well come on, she's obviously a girl.....*very* obviously. I mean look at those....
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Argus: Ow, hey...
Thragdor: But de boy elves is just as pretty (frowns)
Argus: Heh heh, yeah, thats true...they're attractive in a sort of "Hey you know if you were a girl..." kind of way.
Felix: (cough) Ahem.
Argus: Oh, right, sorry.
Felix: Anyway. Argus, it says here your group once repelled 17 mid groups at once?
Argus: Oh, yeah. BUNKER OF FAITH BABY!
Felix: Surely you can't defeat 17 groups with just Bunker of Faith?
Argus: Duh, n00b, of course you can. BOF2WIN!
Felix: .......
Thragdor: Thrag has trouble choppin through da bunkar....
Elstarianna: Well, it *is* the only way they can win...
Argus: See?! BOOYAH.
Felix: ..........(sigh)
Felix: Thragdor, it says here you once managed to defeat a Lurikeen Hero in one on one combat?
Thragdor: Ya, Thragdor smashed.
Felix: Aren't Lurikeens sort of...I don't know...a heck of a lot smaller then you?
Thragdor: Oh ya, they little....and quick....gotta smash fast. Once Thragdor got one on his leg. Made Thragdor feel real weird cus Thragdor thought it was like....you know when dogs get up on yer leg and start humpin? Ya, like that. But it turn out he was just trynna stab Thragdor.
Felix: ......so anyway, how did you defeat the Hero?
Thragdor: Oh, Thragdor hit em.
Felix: ........and then?
Thragdor: Thragdor hit em more.
Felix: ...........ok right, then what?
Thragdor: Well....den......uh.....lemme see.......oh, Thragdor hit em more.
Felix: ....did you stop hitting him at any point and do something different?
Thragdor: Oh, ya, of course. Thragdor just hit him till he stop movin and gave arpees. Den Thragdor laugh and laugh...
Felix: ......er.
Thragdor: and laugh and laugh, Thragdor sorta forget what he was laughing about. Den Thragdor laughed some more cus that was funny dat Thragdor forgot.
Felix: ...ok lets just play.
Felix: Argus, sadly, the board is still yours.
Argus: Rock!
Argus: I'll take Roleplayers for 100g.
Felix: Answer. When someone with a non-suitable name is spotted, Roleplayers have this option at their disposal.
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: Name Nazi's!
Felix: ...that doesn't even fit the question, plus its not nice to throw around a word like Nazi.
Argus: Quiet! Gameshow Nazi!
Felix: ..........
Felix: Hell with it.
Felix: Elstarianna, you have the board now.
Argus: Dude =[ uncool.
Elstarianna: I'll take Realm vs Realm for 100g, Fe...
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
Elstarianna: STOP THAT!
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
(Argus hugs Elstarianna)
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Elstarianna: Don't you have some sheep or something you could go bother?!
Argus: Hah, yeah, sheep. The trick with sheep is you have to wait till they bend over, then "pretend" it was the wind that flipped your kilt up, and...er...HEY! I resent that stereotype!
Thragdor: kilt?
Argus: Yeah, kilt. See? This thing.
Thragdor: haw haw, silly Albie. Wearin a man skirt.
Argus: ITS NOT A SKIRT! ITS A KILT! YOU HALF WIT TROLL BASTARD!
Thragdor: he he he, man skirt.
Elstarianna: I slide my warm, delicate hands up and down your hard, lustrous chest....and then I....
Elstarianna: !
Elstarianna: MT!
Argus: .....................
Thragdor: ........
Felix: ..........
Felix: Please refrain from further mt's if at all possible...
Argus: Wait wait, I'd like to hear more of em if at all possible.
Thragdor: Thragdor like stories.
Argus: Me too, buddy, me too.
Felix: (sigh) The board is still yours Elstarianna.
Elstarianna: (cough) ok. I'll take Use Tactics! for 200g then.
Felix: Answer. What is the most effective tool to use in order to take down a keep door?
Elstarianna: (buzz)
Felix: Elstarianna?
Elstarianna: ALARM CLOCK RAID!
Felix: ....er no, that is incorrect. Anyone else?
Thragdor: (buzz)
Felix: Thragdor?
Thragdor: Thrag smash it when no one is awake to fight back.
Felix: ........incorrect. Argus?
Argus: (buzz)
Argus: Dude, Minstrel solo the Lord. Duh.
Felix: For the love a....no, thats incorrect. Elstarianna, you have the board again.
Elstarianna: I'll take Those Silly Hibbies for 200g.
Felix: Answer. Name one item of head gear sold by the hat merchant thats unique to Hibernia.
Argus: (buzz)
Felix: Argus?
Argus: Ivy woven panties.
Felix: ........thats not head gear.
Argus: Not in your dull, boring life perhaps.
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Argus: HEY! What was that for?
Elstarianna: Just because.
Thragdor: Thrag not know what panties are....
Argus: Well, they're like, undergarmets, but...
(Elstarianna slaps Argus)
Argus: STOP THAT!
Elstarianna: Perv.
Argus: Says the queen of cyber.
(Argus sticks out his tongue at Elstarianna)
(Elstarianna blushs)
Elstarianna: I will hurt you!
Thragdor: Thrag still not know what panties are.
Felix: Ok, come on, stop fighting.
Elstarianna: Quiet you.
Felix: Hey! I'm the host here people.
Elstarianna casts a spell!
Felix is stunned by a barrage of color!
Argus: Ahahaha
Thragdor: Ooooh....purdy colors.
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: Ow, hey. Quit it.
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: Stop that! Seriously, that kinda hurts!
Thragdor:OH! Oh oh oh oh oh! Thrag want to hit something to!
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: Quit it quit it quit it quit it!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor goes into a berzerker rage!
Argus: !
(Argus cheers at Thragdor)
Argus: SPAMTEHDOUBLEFROST2WIN!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Argus: Rock! I didn't know the human jaw could bend that way!
Felix was just killed by Thragdor!
Argus: Oh, wait. Damn dude, you ganked our meal ticket, er, host.
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Argus: .....dude he's already dead, its ok, you can stop now.
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Thragdor attacks Felix with his axe!
Argus: Oh man, thats just not pretty.
Announcer: Er.....thats all the time we have for tonight folks! Tune in next time!
Argus: Is there a Cleric in the house?
Argus: Dude, c'mon, we need a rez here. Cleric? Anyone? Hell, Paladin? Ghetto rez?
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: I SAID KNOCK IT OFF!
(Rolls Credits)
Argus: Wait wait! I had a 100g! Doesn't that mean I win?
(Roll Credits)
Argus: Where's my 100g!? C'mon, dude. I need a house.
Elstarianna attacks Argus with her staff!
Argus: DAMMIT! I SAID STOP THAT!
(ROLL CREDITS!)
:lol:
