The Tale of Morimdin.

CuddleBunny!

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I was bored the other day, so I decided to write about my Paladin!
I am aware of the large ammount of spelling and grammar error, but Word refused to let me use the spelling check :<

If you are like, liking it I will write more!:] If you dont I wont write anymore ;)


The Tale of Morimdin

This is not a tale of a great Sir, nor a Lord or a Knight. This is the tale of a commoner, a poor farmer called Morimdin
This young lad worked day in and day out on his little farm in the wild Salisbury Plains, to get some food on his plate.
He lived alone in the far corner of Salisbury Plains, close to the dark and cursed forests of Avalon March, better known as the Campacorentin Forest.
In this forest there were said to be wild trees that could walk tall and talk loud, ogres and goblins, little pixies and great spiders, withces and the filidh clans very leader, the evil magess Elithralia Noditli. And not to mention the burial toomb called Keltoi Fogou, wich now are the home of the filidh clan where they practise their evil and dark magic.
There is also said to be large ammounts of cave-gobblins in this place.
But far away from this dark and evil place, out on a farm in the Salisbury Plains, is Morimdin. He is planting potatoes when he hear a horse in the distance.
Morimdin puts down the potatoes and walks over to his house to get a pitchfork, for visitors does not come often in these places, and he feared that it might be a man coming to robb and kill him. He had heard rumours of the bandit clan moving troughout the plains, and he feared them.
However he was lucky, cause the man on the horse were no bandit. It was a great Knight of Adribard, coming at high speed out of the dark forest.
When the horseman came closer Morimdin saw blood, and arrows in the Knight. When the Knight came close, he fell down from his horse and on the ground. He did not move.
Morimdin ran over to the night and sat down at hist side, and took of the Knighst helm. The Knights face was pale as a morning mist, and his eyes were completely black.
The Knight told Morimdin that he was on his way troughthe Campacorentin Forest with a urgent and vital message to Lord Adribard, from King Constantine himself, and that he had been ambushed by a band of filidhs who cast black magic upon him, and shot arrows after him. The Knight told Morimdin that he came here cause he had seen the little farm the night before when he rode past it, and that Moirimdin had to bring the message to Lord Adribard at all costs.
Morimdin carried the Knight inside and tried to help him, but it was all in vain for the Knight passed away during the night.
At first light Morimdin packed some food and cloths and went out to the Knights horse. Before he climbed the horse he stood still, watching the forest, it was much to quiet he thought, no birds or animals... not even a breeze that danced over the treetops. He tought to himself "that place is evil and cursed.. I do not dare to ride trough there!".
He sat down with his back against his house, panting, he was scared and cowardly. "Why is there no other Knight that can come and pick up the message? Why do I have to do this? I am naught but a farmer!" he tought to himself. He was curious and wondered what message could be so important. He knew it was not right, and far from legal to break the royal seal, but he did it anyway. When young Morimdin read the message he stopped panting, his eyes grew big and his face white. He folded the message and put it in his backpack, got up on the horse and started trotting towards the forest. When he got close he stoped a for a second to scout the forest line, and there he saw it, it was a pack of warrior goblins trying to hide behind the trees! The filidh must have talked them into this plot aswell! Morimdin felt a tear running down his cheek. What would happen to the poor people of Avalon March if he did not bring the message to Lord Adribard? But Morimdin did not even have armor or a sword! he knew there was alot of toomb raiders in the oposite corner of the Salisbury Plains, he decided to kill one and steal its armor and weaponary. He rode hard trough the day, until he could glimse a camp in the horizon, he roped the horse to a tree, and sat down waiting for the dark.
When night came Morimdin took his dagger out from the horsepack, and started running towards the camp in cover of darkness. Morimdin was no hero, but working as a farmer all his life he was hardy and strong, when he was young he often played hide and seek with his friends, and he learned alot of sneaky tactics from it.
So there he was, a young farmer with a vital message that would save lives, in the outskirts of a large toomb raider camp. He sat down behind a rock to think for a second, then he heard footsteps! "Oh no! what do I do now?" he tought. He saw light aproaching, suddenly a man walked by "thank the lords! he did not see me!". Morimdin silently got up from the hidingplace, looked arround and saw there was nobody arround but the lookout who just passed by.
Morimdin snuk up to the lookout, and swiftly but silently he cut his troath, and grabbed him so he wouldnt make a sound when falling.
Morimdin noticed that the man he just killed wore a pretty studded leather armor, Morimdin fumbled arround a bit, but after some time he got the armor off the dead man, and onto himself. "Fits perfectly! Shame the bugger didnt own a weapon" he tought to himself. He knew what evildoers those folks were, so he did not mind slaying another one.
Morimdin got closer to the camp, he saw only one guard in the middle of the camp, the rest was sleeping. "Well this will be like stealing tourmalines of a dead spider!"
He got close to camp and started looking closely to see if he could find a weapon anywhere. He saw a torch coming towards his direction from the right side of the camp. He looked arround to find a place to hide "ah! that tree shall be nice for hiding!" he tought to himself, and started climbing a tree. He crouched out on a branch hanging over the place wher he guessed the patrol would go.
When the patrolman came close enough, young Morimdin laped onto the toomb raider, and stabbed him in the troath with his dagger.
This patrolman did not die so silently, he screamed in pain in the short moment before he died. Morimdin grabbed the now dead guards crossbow, armed it and walked over to the edge and looked down to the camp, the guard was standing up looking arround suspiciously. Morimdin aimed at the guards chest for a very long time, not wanting to miss. After some time Morimdin pulled the trigger, and felt a powerfull thrust to his chest. The bolt flew truly and straight as if blessed by the gods, the bolt hit the guard in the heart. He fell down dead like a bird shot out of the sky with a arrow. Morimdin armed the crossbow again and waited a bit to see if any of the sleeping toomb raiders came out. After a while of waiting Morimdin snuk into the camp, found a shield and a short sword. He put the shield on his back, the sword with hilt on his hip and took the crossbow and bolts in his arms and started running to his horse. When he reached his horse the sun was rising and Morimdin was exhausted. He strapped his armor, crossbow and bolts to his horse and got on it. He rode hard until he saw the Campacorentin forest, then he stopped and made camp in the middle of the open field, next to a large tree. He tried to sleep, but he kept thinking of those men he killed today, sure they were bandits of the worst kind, but is he any better if he kill a bandit? After some hours of regret and deep toughts he finally fell asleep. At first light he got pulled out of his sweet sleep by shouting in the distance, it was the toomb raiders that was after him! They had followed his trail and now they saw young Morimdin by the tree.
Morimdin packed his belongings as fast as he could, and got into the saddle and rode as if the devil himself was after him.
He rode straight for the forest, not thinking about the dangers within it.
When Morimdin reached the forest he stoped for a second to think. Suddenly he heard something in the bush, Morimdin got so scared he fell of his horse.
Lying there on the ground defensless and unarmed he regret ever leaving his farm. Then all ofthe sudden 9 men in studded armor, carrying bows came out of the bush. The leader of the 9 came forth to Morimdin and helped him up, appologized for getting him startled. After introducing himself as Woodsman Melihar, a scout trainer with 8 apprentices in his fellowship. He told Morimdin that he brought the apprentices with him for training and protection, as he had to go look for a knight who never made it to his destination. Morimdin wondered how they knew about the knight, and Melihar told him that they attacked and killed a small group of filidh’s in the woods who told them how they had attacked the great knight. Morimdin stood still for a long time, until Melihar asked what was wrong. Morimdin opened up and told the whole story to Melihar and his men. After alot of storytelling and explaining they left at foot into the forsest. Melihar said he would guide Morimdin safely to Adribard’s retreat.
After 5 nights of danger, cold, hunger and fear Morimdin gazed upon the mighty fortress of Adribard’s retreat.
Melihar and Morimdin thanked eachother and said their goodbyes. Morimdin first went to a merchant and got rid of his armor and weapons, and bought a horse and some food. After Morimdin had eaten and freshened up, he seeked audience before Lord Adribard. Morimdin went in to Lord Adribard and explain everything, and after that he delivered the message, still carrying the King’s unbroken seal, to Lord Adribard. After reading the message, and instructing his officers, Lord Adribard said Morimdin had shown outstanding valor, skill and commitment to his King and country, and that he were to become a Paladin of the Church of Albion if he would accept this great honor. Morimdin accepted, even tho he did not want to. Most of everything he wanted to go back to his potatoes and the simple life. But who were he to deny a Lord? After beeing made a Knight, Morimdin were given a marvelous chain mail armor, a longsword and a large shield. Lord Adribard sent him off to the Paladin trainer........


To be continued...



Hope you enjoyed it! :)
 

Accupuncture

Fledgling Freddie
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Well I thought it was very good.

Rushed at the end but kept me reading and wanting more :)

Well done..
 

CuddleBunny!

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Accupuncture said:
Well I thought it was very good.

Rushed at the end but kept me reading and wanting more :)

Well done..
I know I rushed it a bit at the end just wanted to post it before I fell asleep so I kinda hurried =/ I know I shouldn't, but ohwell :p

And eggy, I actually think it fits just as well here :(
Morimdin is the greatestest paladin on prydwen!;O
 

Rhori

Fledgling Freddie
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CuddleBunny! said:
I know I rushed it a bit at the end just wanted to post it before I fell asleep so I kinda hurried =/ I know I shouldn't, but ohwell :p

And eggy, I actually think it fits just as well here :(
Morimdin is the greatestest paladin on prydwen!;O
pfft my thid minstrell would totally own your pally :flame:


just kidding ofcourse ;)

nice story though
 

Mey

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I'd suggest rethinking how you tell the story some times it seemed to jump from one part to another.

Also try spacing it out a bit makes it easier to read and you can tell when one scene closes etc..
 

CuddleBunny!

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Mey said:
I'd suggest rethinking how you tell the story some times it seemed to jump from one part to another.

Also try spacing it out a bit makes it easier to read and you can tell when one scene closes etc..
ty :) will do when/if i decided to write more! and I gotta get stupid word to enable spelling check, just read trough it(again) and found ALOT of errors (small I's, small first-letters, missing spaces etc) :E
The fact that I'm not english makes the story-telling a bit fumbleish:p
Semi-dyslectic(sp?) also, but I see it now that it needs to be devided in scenes and parts etc, hard to keep track from time to time :)
 

Mey

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hehe ye I have the same problem sometimes. The general story is cool, so keep up the good work.

“In this forest there were said to be wild trees that could walk tall and talk loud, ogres and goblins, little pixies and great spiders, withces and the filidh clans very leader, the evil magess Elithralia Noditli. And not to mention the burial toomb called Keltoi Fogou, wich now are the home of the filidh clan where they practise their evil and dark magic.
There is also said to be large ammounts of cave-gobblins in this place.
But far away from this dark and evil place, out on a farm in the Salisbury Plains, is Morimdin.”

Rethink how you tell this bit, seems abit much like a list rather than a description.

Later on in the story you change to the present tense, rather than the past (which can confuse things) so rather than writing something like this:

“Morimdin ran over to the knight and sat down at his side, and took of the Knights helm. The Knights face was pale as a morning mist, and his eyes were completely black.”

Have something like

“Morimdin sprinted over to the knight and dived to his side. He began to remove the Knights helm, slowly revealing a pale face and blackened eyes.”

Hope this helps alittle.

J.
 

CuddleBunny!

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Mey said:
hehe ye I have the same problem sometimes. The general story is cool, so keep up the good work.

“In this forest there were said to be wild trees that could walk tall and talk loud, ogres and goblins, little pixies and great spiders, withces and the filidh clans very leader, the evil magess Elithralia Noditli. And not to mention the burial toomb called Keltoi Fogou, wich now are the home of the filidh clan where they practise their evil and dark magic.
There is also said to be large ammounts of cave-gobblins in this place.
But far away from this dark and evil place, out on a farm in the Salisbury Plains, is Morimdin.”

Rethink how you tell this bit, seems abit much like a list rather than a description.

Later on in the story you change to the present tense, rather than the past (which can confuse things) so rather than writing something like this:

“Morimdin ran over to the knight and sat down at his side, and took of the Knights helm. The Knights face was pale as a morning mist, and his eyes were completely black.”

Have something like

“Morimdin sprinted over to the knight and dived to his side. He began to remove the Knights helm, slowly revealing a pale face and blackened eyes.”

Hope this helps alittle.

J.
It does :) tyvm ;)
you are so much nicer in this thread than you were in the other one :p
Guess you are a bit like me then :E nice from time to time! :p
 

Mey

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It wasn't anything personal just wanted to make a point about the double standards that we see sometimes on FH..
 

Chimaira

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Nicely written.

but how did the seal got back to being sealed? :p

earlier in story it said Morimdin took a sneek peek the bugger xD
 

CuddleBunny!

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Chimaira said:
Nicely written.

but how did the seal got back to being sealed? :p

earlier in story it said Morimdin took a sneek peek the bugger xD
Yeah, i know, guess i forgot x(
 

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