O
old.Tohtori
Guest
Today i've been talking with the Box of Many Voices and Colors like i do every day and a few things rose from the graves again to haunt my mind. Ofcourse these could be killed and re-buried but why not share them with you people? Because noone wants to hear them. Because there's much better things to read on the interwww.net. Because your mother told never to read anything Teh Seel writes. Ok, so there's reasons but let's not mind those. This week the topics go from side to side and up and down like a rubberball in a dryer but try to hang on 'cause it's time to take another fast and topsyturny ride with your Icefloat capitan, El Seel.
But i'm not strong enough to go out there! "...there! Now you are!"
Training. Let's take a runemaster as an example. You go out, because some grande trainer told you to, and do silly tasks or you simply go out and kill boobries with that one spell your grandmother taught you. You do this for 4 levels(yes levels..will get to that later) and then you go back to your trainer, discussion follows:
Student: "What do you want me to do now master?"
Trainer: "Hmm..you're ready to become a runemaster."
Student: "Really? That last boobrie nearly bit my head off..."
Trainer: "Yes. Your..umm..aura shows that you area ready."
Student: "But i really don't thin..."
Trainer: "Go."
Student: "Bu..."
Trainer: "I said go!"
Even if you get kicked in the arse every 5 mobs you still are fit as a runemaster. Standards aren't that high i guess. So, the student promptly heads up the stairs to the runemaster. Another discussion follows:
Student: "I was told to talk to you."
Runemaster: "Yes. Are you ready to become a runemaster?"
Student: "Well...yeah i guess."
Runemaster makes a few motions with his hands and sparkles fly.
Runemaster: "There. Now here's your staff and book of spells."
Student: "Huh?! That's it? Now i'm a runemaster?"
Runemaster: "Yes. Serve the realm well."
Student: "But what about these spells 'n stuff...how do i use them?"
Runemaster: "Easy. Afterall you are a glorious runemaster now."
Student walks out.
Student was killed by a green-con.
I might be wrong in what my idea of "training" is but coming to a guy every level, saying "I'd like deathspells for 20 points" isn't that..well.. training.
From breadboxes to mastercrafted swords.
So you want to become a weaponcrafter and help the realm? Sure thing. Now make a few hundred breadboxes and you'll learn how to make a sword. Umm..right. It's amazing what you can learn from making containers for soft mushy dinners. I think, and might be wrong again, but if i started banging on a piece of metal and made a breadbox i still would know bullcrap about making a scimitar or a broadsword. Now then, making a staff weapon requires fletching, this is quite normal. But simply to make a wooden stick isn't enough, we all know that leather hurts more then wood so before that staff is ready you'll need a bit of leatherworking to learn how to twist a piece of leather around a wooden pole. I don't know about the ameriguns but i have a good idea how to wrap a long piece of leather on a piece of wood. Might be special in that way..maybe i need to enlist myself to american idol.
I'm better then you..you can't hit me.
This is a silly thing i've noticed on my many adventures. So there's a group of HEadhunters on that hill over there, ooh...scary...they have big weapons and they hit you like no tomorrow. If you go close you'll surely die. So let's train a bit, get older and go back. Hmm, seems they con gray now. I poke one, poke a second, poke a third and they get quite angry and all attack me. Now i turn my back on them, sit down and they keep missing me. I'm still the same size, same armor on, i'm not even moving and they miss all the time. I guess that's why those Headhunters who chased me, only 15 minutes ago, across the realm now don't even want to get close to me. Must have something to do with divine blessings from gods above or the Headhunters just don't put the same effort into the battle when they've killed you for about 50 times allready.
Now since i know about fashion as much as why n'sync is a worldwide success, here's Bunny The Bouncer to tell you about a few fashion tips for the wannab hip fighter.
"Helloo all! It's so fun to see you all here and..oh my..that gentleman in the corner allready seems to have read my Fashion For The Winter book since he has mixed purple with green in a stomach twisting manner. Bravo! Yes. The season is for purple and pink in the world of DAoC. If you really want to be the hip fighter in the frontiers you should atleast try and add three different colors to your outfit. The brighter the better! Especially if you're a stealther you should wear royal blue, pink and yellow to really blend into the wildlife. Now the basic, one color, one mind attitude is gone, no longer should you think that wearing one or maximum of two colors would look good. If you have dark brown and dark red as colors, you just can't expect to be taken seriously by your comrades in battle. Here's a good outfit that really will make the other realm fighters fear you:
Hat: Since this is the top part and first to show, it should be pink or purple. Nothing strikes fear more efficiently in the heart then a soldier who washed his white hat with his wifes unnamed.
Torso: Since we have purple/pink as a hat, we should colorcode like a colorblind mongoose. Use brown, gray or black to really bring out the hat.
Arms and legs: Now in no way should these be the same color. It's a crying shame we can't have different colored sleaves since that would be heaven! But with what we got, use the combinations- blue/yellow, red/green or red/yellow for the sleaves and leggings to really mix and match for the rest of the outfit.
Hands and feet: Same rules apply to these as do to the arms and legs. But remember, if you have blue sleaves and red leggings, use atleast yellow gloves and green boots to make the outfit perfect.
There you go, some Bunny tips for the fashionable fighter for the dark ages."
Exiting isn't it? Now Bunny has to go design some thongs for the modern day troll and i have to retreat back to Teh Icefloat but fear not, a new day shall bring new things to think about. Until i return, try not to get killed out there and if you do, atleast do it in style and dress Bunny style!
But i'm not strong enough to go out there! "...there! Now you are!"
Training. Let's take a runemaster as an example. You go out, because some grande trainer told you to, and do silly tasks or you simply go out and kill boobries with that one spell your grandmother taught you. You do this for 4 levels(yes levels..will get to that later) and then you go back to your trainer, discussion follows:
Student: "What do you want me to do now master?"
Trainer: "Hmm..you're ready to become a runemaster."
Student: "Really? That last boobrie nearly bit my head off..."
Trainer: "Yes. Your..umm..aura shows that you area ready."
Student: "But i really don't thin..."
Trainer: "Go."
Student: "Bu..."
Trainer: "I said go!"
Even if you get kicked in the arse every 5 mobs you still are fit as a runemaster. Standards aren't that high i guess. So, the student promptly heads up the stairs to the runemaster. Another discussion follows:
Student: "I was told to talk to you."
Runemaster: "Yes. Are you ready to become a runemaster?"
Student: "Well...yeah i guess."
Runemaster makes a few motions with his hands and sparkles fly.
Runemaster: "There. Now here's your staff and book of spells."
Student: "Huh?! That's it? Now i'm a runemaster?"
Runemaster: "Yes. Serve the realm well."
Student: "But what about these spells 'n stuff...how do i use them?"
Runemaster: "Easy. Afterall you are a glorious runemaster now."
Student walks out.
Student was killed by a green-con.
I might be wrong in what my idea of "training" is but coming to a guy every level, saying "I'd like deathspells for 20 points" isn't that..well.. training.
From breadboxes to mastercrafted swords.
So you want to become a weaponcrafter and help the realm? Sure thing. Now make a few hundred breadboxes and you'll learn how to make a sword. Umm..right. It's amazing what you can learn from making containers for soft mushy dinners. I think, and might be wrong again, but if i started banging on a piece of metal and made a breadbox i still would know bullcrap about making a scimitar or a broadsword. Now then, making a staff weapon requires fletching, this is quite normal. But simply to make a wooden stick isn't enough, we all know that leather hurts more then wood so before that staff is ready you'll need a bit of leatherworking to learn how to twist a piece of leather around a wooden pole. I don't know about the ameriguns but i have a good idea how to wrap a long piece of leather on a piece of wood. Might be special in that way..maybe i need to enlist myself to american idol.
I'm better then you..you can't hit me.
This is a silly thing i've noticed on my many adventures. So there's a group of HEadhunters on that hill over there, ooh...scary...they have big weapons and they hit you like no tomorrow. If you go close you'll surely die. So let's train a bit, get older and go back. Hmm, seems they con gray now. I poke one, poke a second, poke a third and they get quite angry and all attack me. Now i turn my back on them, sit down and they keep missing me. I'm still the same size, same armor on, i'm not even moving and they miss all the time. I guess that's why those Headhunters who chased me, only 15 minutes ago, across the realm now don't even want to get close to me. Must have something to do with divine blessings from gods above or the Headhunters just don't put the same effort into the battle when they've killed you for about 50 times allready.
Now since i know about fashion as much as why n'sync is a worldwide success, here's Bunny The Bouncer to tell you about a few fashion tips for the wannab hip fighter.
"Helloo all! It's so fun to see you all here and..oh my..that gentleman in the corner allready seems to have read my Fashion For The Winter book since he has mixed purple with green in a stomach twisting manner. Bravo! Yes. The season is for purple and pink in the world of DAoC. If you really want to be the hip fighter in the frontiers you should atleast try and add three different colors to your outfit. The brighter the better! Especially if you're a stealther you should wear royal blue, pink and yellow to really blend into the wildlife. Now the basic, one color, one mind attitude is gone, no longer should you think that wearing one or maximum of two colors would look good. If you have dark brown and dark red as colors, you just can't expect to be taken seriously by your comrades in battle. Here's a good outfit that really will make the other realm fighters fear you:
Hat: Since this is the top part and first to show, it should be pink or purple. Nothing strikes fear more efficiently in the heart then a soldier who washed his white hat with his wifes unnamed.
Torso: Since we have purple/pink as a hat, we should colorcode like a colorblind mongoose. Use brown, gray or black to really bring out the hat.
Arms and legs: Now in no way should these be the same color. It's a crying shame we can't have different colored sleaves since that would be heaven! But with what we got, use the combinations- blue/yellow, red/green or red/yellow for the sleaves and leggings to really mix and match for the rest of the outfit.
Hands and feet: Same rules apply to these as do to the arms and legs. But remember, if you have blue sleaves and red leggings, use atleast yellow gloves and green boots to make the outfit perfect.
There you go, some Bunny tips for the fashionable fighter for the dark ages."
Exiting isn't it? Now Bunny has to go design some thongs for the modern day troll and i have to retreat back to Teh Icefloat but fear not, a new day shall bring new things to think about. Until i return, try not to get killed out there and if you do, atleast do it in style and dress Bunny style!
uke: