Students are stupid

[whipped]

Sorry to any students, but here are some examples from the computer based exams I am running this morning.

No less than 12 people logged out of the machines and logged in as their student accounts. This is despite the fact that when they sit at the machine it would have a small input box that says "Enter your name to start exam"

One girl has just sat for 20 minutes in the exam without the use of a mouse. Someone plugged her mouse into the machine next to her an was using it. It is impossible to do these exams without a mouse. 20 minutes!!

The female students don't seem to relealise that when they sit down wearing tight jeans, they invariably show off half their ass crack. (Not that I'm really complaining about this part.)

Finally, I just found a guy surfing porn. He didn't realise the computer lab was closed for an exam. Despite people giving out instructions for the exam, the complete silence of the room and two signs on the door saying "EXAM IN PROGRESS"

I'm worried for our future. Some of these people could be running the country one day.

 

[Munkey-]

only 20 minutes? GCSE History exam had somebody who did the whole exam, about 1 hour and a half, on totally the wrong paper on something we hadnt covered. He only stuck his hand up during the last 5 mins to ask if it was right

 

[Testin da Cable]

why surf for pr0n when there's a veritable superabundance of female bumcrackage packed in tight jeans to be had?

but then again my st00dent days are lost in the mists of time

 

[whipped]

Originally posted by Testin da Cable
why surf for pr0n when there's a veritable superabundance of female bumcrackage packed in tight jeans to be had?

but then again my st00dent days are lost in the mists of time

Unfortunetly, having been a student here in the past and now working here, my student days don't seem to have quite ended yet. I have a feeling my body can't take much more of this punishment. Time to get a job in the private sector me-thinks.

 

[Testin da Cable]

we can swap if you like. you get the stress and 15hr days followed up by getting paged 7 times per night (usually at around 4-5am. you know, the bloodsugar thing...they can tell)

and I....will gladly ogle teh wimmins in tight jeans and explain that the mouse goes in the green hole*













*may not be entirely accurate

 

[whipped]

Yep, it's the green hole

Come to think of it, I think I'll stick to my 4 hour lunches down the pub on a Friday afternoon and my ability to surf the web nearly all day, while still getting work done.

 

[Lester]

Your bird has a green hole?

 

[throdgrain]

I'll never forget the bloke next to me in my c.s.e metalwork exam spent the whole time there drawing a picture of a kind of cartoon flower all over the front page of the exam sheet Bet he had a good score !
Unlike me, I got a grade 5 CSE ! Yay ! Only one more grade down and it would have been ungradable. I was actually kind of dissapointed, as i was aiming for the worst result possible .

 

[Wij]

It's great when you can see the G-Strings. Arses are great aren't they ? Almost as nice as b00bs. And women's underwear. Brill. Really brill.

 

[Testin da Cable]

Originally posted by whipped

Come to think of it, I think I'll stick to my 4 hour lunches down the pub on a Friday afternoon and my ability to surf the web nearly all day, while still getting work done.

I hate you now

 

[whipped]

My work here is done

 

[Wij]

Put the webcam on the lady-bum-cleavage plz. I have a spare hour or two at work I'd like to while away in ogle heaven.

 

[xane]

I'm a bit worried about Wij, he seems awfully eager to prove his horny testosterone induced manliness recently, as if he was trying to disprove something ... now what could that be ?

 

[Testin da Cable]

I suspect wij's missus wears the pants around his casa mate

 

[Wij]

teh hot-pants !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

 

[Wij]

Originally posted by xane
I'm a bit worried about Wij, he seems awfully eager to prove his horny testosterone induced manliness recently, as if he was trying to disprove something ... now what could that be ?

fuck off xena


*ogle xena*

 

[Testin da Cable]

*point*

*laugh*

*spread rumors about wij and underaged dead goats*

 

[Wij]

They weren't dead.

Well, not at first.

 

[Testin da Cable]

you sure?

 

[|WarpiG|]

i had a tutor in Uni that used a mouse upside down... left was right, up was down... buttons under the palm of your hand!

when the tutors are fukin idiots wot hope do the students have???
i failed btw, but i blame id for relasing Q2 in my final year

 

[Perplex]

Originally posted by Wij
It's great when you can see the G-Strings. Arses are great aren't they ? Almost as nice as b00bs. And women's underwear. Brill. Really brill.

To be honest, tits are really over rated. It's all ass baby. Ass, a nice firm taut ass. Then thighs. Then midriff, and then last - tits. And the tits need to be small. Pert as hell, and small. Ballerina stylie

Mmmmm

//edit: oh, face is an obvious pre-requisite but I've NEVER been able to decide where it fits into The List. I've come to the decision that it's equal first. A woman can have all of the things on The List but still be unacceptable due to the face. And the same works in reverse

//edit 2: oh, and personality fits into the equation somewhere too. Probabaly just after joint first ass/face

//edit 3: hmmm - and intelligence. Shit this is complicated Anyone want to formulate a mathematical equation for me please?

 

[dysfunction]

If a women has a great pair of legs and arms, the rest falls into place pretty well....apart from the breasts as they seem to have a mind of their own.

 

[~YuckFou~]

I notice eyes first, then the other stuff. The other stuff needs to be good too, but if the eyes don't work for me then the other stuff is irrelevant.

 

[Wij]

As mentioned I notice b00bs first because that's where my eyes naturally go.

 

[xane]

Originally posted by Perplex
//edit 3: hmmm - and intelligence. Shit this is complicated Anyone want to formulate a mathematical equation for me please?

 

[danger]

It's all about legs really, as perp said... face is a prerequisite, tits are nice, midriffs, asses are all good, on the other hand personality is neither here nor there really, at the end of the day they're just pieces of meat. They serve one basic purpose and one alone.


















/me spies an angry mob of feminists - *flees*

 

[bodhi]

1) Face. Has to be pretty, due to the lack of paper bags in my area.
2) Tits. Big enough to grab a handful/slide cock inbetween, but not pointing at the floor pls thx. Tits that disappear when she is lying on her back = biggest turnoff ever.
3) Personality. Any prospective Mrs Bodhi must have one.
3.5) Sense of humour. See above.
4) Shaved or Trimmed. No forests pls. I don't appreciate flossing whilst eating.
5) Legs. Two would be preferable, although less means they're can't run as quickly. Errrr..
6) Common Sense. Far more important than intelligence imo.
7) Ass. Not hugely important, but I'd prefer it to have some shape. I can't stand shapeless asses. And I'd rather it was too big than too small. Something about a cushion for the pushin'.
8) Midriff. Although if the girl in question's last name is Spears this jumps up to 3.

 

[Mr^B]

Surely Time and Money is "Time + Money"

6 apples and 2 oranges != "6 Apples x 2 Oranges"

Kind Regards,

Mr^B (CEO of the "anal brigade")

ps.

In order:

Tits
Face
Arse
Personality
Personal Hygiene (If I want a cheese and tuna sandwich I'll go to Benji's and order one, OK?)

 

[Delboy]

I asked myself this and came up with the following order.

Voice
General shape of person (without looking too hard)
Body language,posture
Face and facial animation
Eyes

Not neccessarily in that order, but maybe in a basic sense it works that way.

Some of these things your mind picks up on so quickly without you realising it. I mind one book "Relate" talked about a picture that you have deep in your mind which you react to when someone fits the bill (or close)

The rest is a bonus, but it all depends on what you want innit? If its the good set of firm mouth watering breasts and good shape of arse to hold onto when you're on top, then not a lot of the above matters.

 

[Maljonic]

ANKLES! WONT SOMEBODY THINK OF THE ANKLES?!