politics in da workplace

  • Thread starter Testin da Cable
  • Start date
T

Testin da Cable

Guest
the decree:
thou shalt use dns names for all things. all servers shall know each other by dnsname alone. IP numbers are evil, and far beyond the ken of the manager supreme.

me:
that would be unsound. a wise manager would listen to the tech. the tech is his advisor in such matters. the tech states that the correct action would be to have all critical services IP only, with dns as backup. a dns-only setup will invite problems if the servers become unavailable for some reason.

the decree:
j00 stfu stupid tech!!23 I am the leet manager!! I am having big degree!!!32 the dns servers are uber-stable!!!@3 the company who supplied them gave me a three week all expenses paid holiday!!12 and a car!!2 they wouldn't do that if their product was shitty!!23

me:
*sigh* you are the most ignorant sob I've even had the misfortune to deal with.

the decree:
WTF!!!@35 j00 w|ll b3 h34ring fr0m j00r b0$$!~!!243

boss:
TdC, in future please try to be more tactful when dealing with retarded people. consider yourself reprimanded. your punishment is getting me a coffee

me:
I hear and obey, oh master.


this isn't quite the way it was...but you get my drift heh. the corp.dns servers are unavailable. both my feet are up on my desk, and I'm surfing via laptop to phoneline.
I feel that I won't be able to gather any motivation at all today. I might as well be at home.
 
K

kanonfodda

Guest
heh, sounds about right.

They never listen to the techie's :(
 
T

throdgrain

Guest
Thats because techies are too....techie......
 
S

Sar

Guest
Non tech-heads seem to think though, as do most ppl, that new = better.

Not always so in my experience...

And TDCs by the looks of things :)
 
W

Will

Guest
The worst thing is training non-techie people to do techie things...
Bane of my life:eek:
 
S

Sar

Guest
Originally posted by ItchyTrigaFinga
The worst thing is training non-techie people to do techie things...
Bane of my life:eek:

Christ tell me about it.

There's a woman in my office, who, despite having a PC sat in front of her for the past four years still has a less than fundemental understanding of M$ software, which she has used every single working day of those four years...

Questions like:

My office toolbar has disappeared, where has it gone to?

Answer: You've undocked it from the side of the screen, minimise all your windows and redock it (twice a week on average that one, never sinks in. Usually followed up by: How do I move it?)

Double click on this icon? Right or left mouse button?

How do I create a new document on this floppy disc that I want to put this word document into?

(IE: How do I save this already typed Word.doc to a floppy disc)

And so on and so forth...

Try that level of banality every day for now on 8½ years - now you know one of the reasons I leave this place in 7 weeks...
 
M

mr.Blacky

Guest
then try to teach your family :rolleyes: you cant bitch them and you cant run away :mad:
 
K

kanonfodda

Guest
Originally posted by Mr.Blackshirt
then try to teach your family :rolleyes: you cant bitch them and you cant run away :mad:

wanna bet!! I Bitch at my family all the time, I get fed up with it

Originally said by KF's mum
But I don't need to learn any of it, I have you!

bastards, shout at em, they pay attention then.
 
S

Summo

Guest
I FEEL YOUR PAIN, TDC!

** Non-IT people are advised to skip to the next post now ***

My biggest headache over the past few months has been lack of space on our Exchange server. It's a big bastard, but not big enough and consequently a while ago we were nearing only having 2GB of free space. Anyone who uses Exchange will know that if the server runs out of space all Exchange services stop and you have a lump of very expensive metal and plastic which contains people's most valuable, inaccesible data.

When they migrated to Exchange (I had no part in it, btw) nobody set limits on mailbox sizes - there was no policy on how Exchange should be used. Three years later the largest five mailboxes are now over 2GB EACH! Five people take up nearly 10% of the total server capacity.

The problem was recognised by those on high, and I drew up a comprehensive but clear document (with screenies and everything) on how people can archive their mailbox, set folder structures, remove duplicated messages and attachments, delete old stuff and so on. It was approved and distributed with the added bonus that 1st level support will help peeps out. I would later impose an initial limit of 500MB per mailbox, dropping to 300MB, and eventually settle at 100MB.

Senior Management (hail) complained that they were far too important to bother with this and their secretary's weren't sufficiently IT minded to deal with it (despite the clear document and IT support) so they agreed amongst themselves that they would be exempt. Senior Management would have the potential for infinite mailboxes, though they rejected the need for additional servers.

Ooh! And what a surprise! Its the Senior Management mailboxes which take up 10GB, with the rest of Management close behind, and growing. Pissed me off no end.

The equivalent I can think of is for the governent to say "Right! To stop violent crime we're making all guns illegal! But if you have one already you can keep it."
 
W

Wij

Guest
You told them they must have their own server, cost £30,000 then ?
 
S

Sar

Guest
Summo: I'd let them continue on their merry way, and when the server collapses tell them exactly why it has done so: It's their fault. And when they (inevitably) say "Well why weren't we warned?" you can pull out your screenies etc and say remember these?

Then call them selfish cunts.

:)
 
S

Summo

Guest
That would be smart. I could wander round the various buildings singing a song to Senior Management and laughing. Then I'd hand my notice in.

Unfortunately its my job to 'find a way' so I doubt I'd get off scott-free, though they are making a rock for their back, as 'twere.

In Exchange there is a 'Clean Mailbox' facility which will allow me to delete items based on a filter. Basically I could delete everything from their mailboxes that's at least a year old and I doubt they would ever notice. I've had my finger hover over that button a few times now...
 
S

Sar

Guest
Then take their jobs and you can have yourself a nice big mailbox.

:D
 
W

Wij

Guest
Magically make a 30 gig raid array into a 60 gig one by using your own money. Obvious really.
 
S

Sar

Guest
Fuck them, wipe everything in their mailboxes over 60 seconds old.

Then tell them the server has a built in auto-delete function that wipes the largest amount of redundant data to prevent system crashes, and it just so happened to be their mailboxes which were the sole culprits.

They wouldn't have a fucking clue :D
 
W

Wij

Guest
Tell them it only deletes pr0n :D

Manager: But I had 10 gig's worth of emails... err... oh, no. i had none. ok. :(
 
S

Summo

Guest
Heh heh. Good suggestions, ppl. I shall distribute this page to the understanding peeps in my office. :D
 
W

Wij

Guest
All of this thread ?

.............m...........
.............0.........m.
.............0........0..
.....m0.............0..
.......0..................
...........................
...............m.........
..............0...........
..............0...........
...........................
............................
..........mmmm.......
.........m...m...m.....
.........m...m...m.....
.........m.........m.....
.........m.........m.....
..........0000000.......
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
............0.....0........
......m...0.....0.....m..
.......m..0.....0....m...
.......000.......000m....
......0.................0....
.....0...................0mm.
mm0...................0...
.....0..................0...
......0.......0.......0....
.......00000.0000.....
..........m.......m......
..........m........m.....
 
S

Summo

Guest
I would appreciate an ASCII vagina, so the ladiees in the office don't feel disciminated against.

Thanks.
 
K

Kempo

Guest
Code:
 8888  8888888
                  888888888888888888888888
               8888:::8888888888888888888888888
             8888::::::8888888888888888888888888888
            88::::::::888:::8888888888888888888888888
          88888888::::8:::::::::::88888888888888888888
        888 8::888888::::::::::::::::::88888888888   888
           88::::88888888::::m::::::::::88888888888    8
         888888888888888888:M:::::::::::8888888888888
        88888888888888888888::::::::::::M88888888888888
        8888888888888888888888:::::::::M8888888888888888
         8888888888888888888888:::::::M888888888888888888
        8888888888888888::88888::::::M88888888888888888888
      88888888888888888:::88888:::::M888888888888888   8888
     88888888888888888:::88888::::M::;o*M*o;888888888    88
    88888888888888888:::8888:::::M:::::::::::88888888    8
   88888888888888888::::88::::::M:;:::::::::::888888888
  8888888888888888888:::8::::::M::aAa::::::::M8888888888       8
  88   8888888888::88::::8::::M:::::::::::::888888888888888 8888
 88  88888888888:::8:::::::::M::::::::::;::88:88888888888888888
 8  8888888888888:::::::::::M::"@@@@@@"::::8w8888888888888888
  88888888888:888::::::::::M:::::"@a@":::::M8i8888888888888888
 8888888888::::88:::::::::M88:::::::::::::M88z88888888888888888
8888888888:::::8:::::::::M88888:::::::::MM888!888888888888888888
888888888:::::8:::::::::M8888888MAmmmAMVMM888*88888888   88888888
888888 M:::::::::::::::M888888888:::::::MM88888888888888   8888888
8888   M::::::::::::::M88888888888::::::MM888888888888888    88888
 888   M:::::::::::::M8888888888888M:::::mM888888888888888    8888
  888  M::::::::::::M8888:888888888888::::m::Mm88888 888888   8888
   88  M::::::::::::8888:88888888888888888::::::Mm8   88888   888
   88  M::::::::::8888M::88888::888888888888:::::::Mm88888    88
   8   MM::::::::8888M:::8888:::::888888888888::::::::Mm8     4
       8M:::::::8888M:::::888:::::::88:::8888888::::::::Mm    2
      88MM:::::8888M:::::::88::::::::8:::::888888:::M:::::M
     8888M:::::888MM::::::::8:::::::::::M::::8888::::M::::M
    88888M:::::88:M::::::::::8:::::::::::M:::8888::::::M::M
   88 888MM:::888:M:::::::::::::::::::::::M:8888:::::::::M:
   8 88888M:::88::M:::::::::::::::::::::::MM:88::::::::::::M
     88888M:::88::M::::::::::*88*::::::::::M:88::::::::::::::M
    888888M:::88::M:::::::::88@@88:::::::::M::88::::::::::::::M
    888888MM::88::MM::::::::88@@88:::::::::M:::8::::::::::::::*8
    88888  M:::8::MM:::::::::*88*::::::::::M:::::::::::::::::88@@
    8888   MM::::::MM:::::::::::::::::::::MM:::::::::::::::::88@@
     888    M:::::::MM:::::::::::::::::::MM::M::::::::::::::::*8
     888    MM:::::::MMM::::::::::::::::MM:::MM:::::::::::::::M
      88     M::::::::MMMM:::::::::::MMMM:::::MM::::::::::::MM
       88    MM:::::::::MMMMMMMMMMMMMMM::::::::MMM::::::::MMM
        88    MM::::::::::::MMMMMMM::::::::::::::MMMMMMMMMM
         88   8MM::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::MMMMMM
          8   88MM::::::::::::::::::::::M:::M::::::::MM
              888MM::::::::::::::::::MM::::::MM::::::MM
             88888MM:::::::::::::::MMM:::::::mM:::::MM
             888888MM:::::::::::::MMM:::::::::MMM:::M
            88888888MM:::::::::::MMM:::::::::::MM:::M
           88 8888888M:::::::::MMM::::::::::::::M:::M
           8  888888 M:::::::MM:::::::::::::::::M:::M:
              888888 M::::::M:::::::::::::::::::M:::MM
             888888  M:::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::M:M
             888888  M:::::M:::::::::@::::::::::::::M::M
             88888   M::::::::::::::@@:::::::::::::::M::M
            88888   M::::::::::::::@@@::::::::::::::::M::M
           88888   M:::::::::::::::@@::::::::::::::::::M::M
          88888   M:::::m::::::::::@::::::::::Mm:::::::M:::M
          8888   M:::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::MM:::::::M:::M
         8888   M:::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::MMM::::::::M:::M
        888    M:::::Mm::::::::::::::::::::::MMM:::::::::M::::M
      8888    MM::::Mm:::::::::::::::::::::MMMM:::::::::m::m:::M
     888      M:::::M::::::::::::::::::::MMM::::::::::::M::mm:::M
  8888       MM:::::::::::::::::::::::::MM:::::::::::::mM::MM:::M:
             M:::::::::::::::::::::::::M:::::::::::::::mM::MM:::Mm
            MM::::::m:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::M::MM:::MM
            M::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::M::M:::MM
           MM:::::::::M:::::::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::M:M:::MM
           M:::::::::::M88:::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::MM::MMM
           M::::::::::::8888888888M::::::::::::::::::::::::MM::MM
           M:::::::::::::88888888M:::::::::::::::::::::::::M::MM
           M::::::::::::::888888M:::::::::::::::::::::::::M::MM
           M:::::::::::::::88888M:::::::::::::::::::::::::M:MM
           M:::::::::::::::::88M::::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
           M:::::::::::::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
           MM:::::::::::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
            M:::::::::::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
            MM:::::::::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
             M:::::::::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
             MM:::::::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
              M:::::::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
              MM:::::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
               M:::::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
               MM:::::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                M:::::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                MM:::::::M::::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                 MM::::::M:::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                 MM:::::M:::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                  MM::::M::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                  MM:::M::::::::::::::::::::MMM
                   MM::M:::::::::::::::::::MMM
                   MM:M:::::::::::::::::::MMM
                    MMM::::::::::::::::::MMM
                    MM::::::::::::::::::MMM
                     M:::::::::::::::::MMM
                    MM::::::::::::::::MMM
                    MM:::::::::::::::MMM
                    MM::::M:::::::::MMM:
                    mMM::::MM:::::::MMMM
                     MMM:::::::::::MMM:M
                     mMM:::M:::::::M:M:M
                      MM::MMMM:::::::M:M
                      MM::MMM::::::::M:M
                      mMM::MM::::::::M:M
                       MM::MM:::::::::M:M
                       MM::MM::::::::::M:m
                       MM:::M:::::::::::MM
                       MMM:::::::::::::::M:
                       MMM:::::::::::::::M:
                       MMM::::::::::::::::M
                       MMM::::::::::::::::M
                       MMM::::::::::::::::Mm
                        MM::::::::::::::::MM
                        MMM:::::::::::::::MM
                        MMM:::::::::::::::MM
                        MMM:::::::::::::::MM
                        MMM:::::::::::::::MM
                         MM::::::::::::::MMM
                         MMM:::::::::::::MM
                         MMM:::::::::::::MM
                         MMM::::::::::::MM
                          MM::::::::::::MM
                          MM::::::::::::MM
                          MM:::::::::::MM
                          MMM::::::::::MM
                          MMM::::::::::MM
                           MM:::::::::MM
                           MMM::::::::MM
                           MMM::::::::MM
                            MM::::::::MM
                            MMM::::::MM
                            MMM::::::MM
                             MM::::::MM
                             MM::::::MM
                              MM:::::MM
                              MM:::::MM:
                              MM:::::M:M
                              MM:::::M:M
                              :M::::::M:
                             M:M:::::::M
                            M:::M::::::M
                           M::::M::::::M
                          M:::::M:::::::M
                         M::::::MM:::::::M
                         M:::::::M::::::::M
                         M;:;::::M:::::::::M
                         M:m:;:::M::::::::::M
                         MM:m:m::M::::::::;:M
                          MM:m::MM:::::::;:;M
                           MM::MMM::::::;:m:M
                            MMMM MM::::m:m:MM
                                  MM::::m:MM
                                   MM::::MM
                                    MM::MM
                                     MMMM
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Similar threads

X
Replies
5
Views
615
Jonaldo
J
J
Replies
22
Views
640
Gumbo
G
D
Replies
37
Views
1K
Dimebag
D
D
Replies
19
Views
1K
kameleon
K
D
Replies
2
Views
463
doh_boy
D
Top Bottom