omg! lol! roffle! kekekekeke

[Summo]

OWOW! LOK AT TIHS!

An 86-year-old man went to his doctor for his annual check-up. The doctor asks him how he's feeling and the 86-year-old says, "I've never felt better. I now have a 20 year-old bride who is pregnant with my child. What do you think about that?" The doctor considers his question for a minute and then begins.

"I have a older friend, much like yourself, who is an avid trophy hunter and never misses a season. One day, when he was going out hunting, he was in a bit of a hurry and accidentally picked up his walking cane instead of his gun.

When he got to the creek, he saw a prime beaver sitting beside the stream of water. He raised his cane and went 'bang, bang'. Suddenly, two shots rang out and the beaver fell over dead. What do you think of that?"

The 86-year-old said, "I'd say somebody else shot the bullets into that beaver."

The doctor replied, "My point exactly."

 

[granny]

Was that an ironic over-exuberance for that joke's funniness in the topic there summo or have you lost the plot?

 

[Summo]

HERE'S ANOTHER! OF EQUAL CALIBRE!

Jim and Mary were both patients in a Mental Hospital. One day while they were walking past the hospital swimming pool, Jim suddenly jumped into the deep end. He sunk to the bottom & stayed there. Mary promptly jumped in to save him. She swam to the bottom and pulled Jim out.

When the medical director became aware of Mary’s heroic act he immediately ordered her to be discharged from the hospital, as he now considered her to be mentally stable.

When he went to tell Mary the news he said, “Mary, I have good news and bad news. The good news is you’re being discharged. Since you were able to jump in and save the life of another patient, I think you’ve regained your senses. The bad news is, Jim, the patient you saved, hung himself with his bathrobe belt in the bathroom. I am so sorry, but he’s dead.”

Mary replied “He didn’t hang himself, I put him there to dry.”

 

[granny]

/me worries about Summo

Actually that second one made me chuckle gently. But I blame that on mental weakness on my part due to excess calvados lastnight.

 

[Wij]

Ricky Gervais interview in FHM had this in this month before anyone accuses me of copying...

Why does Noddy wear a red hat with a bell on it ?

Because he's a cunt.

 

[Stazbumpa]

I'll laugh at your jokes Summo, even if noone else will.

 

[Insane]

Originally posted by Stazbumpa
I'll laugh at you Summo, if everyone else will.

Edit:// quiet day at work

 

[Summo]

Practically silent?

 

[Insane]

Originally posted by Summo
Practically silent?

The local morgue would be nosier than this place!

at least the company proxy hasnt fallen over yet

 

[Pippa666]

lol I thought they were funny

A VISIT TO THE GYNOCOLOGIST

A beautiful, voluptuous woman went to a gynecologist. The doctor took one look at her, and all his professionalism went out the window. He immediately told her to undress. After she had disrobed, the doctor began to stroke her thigh.
Doing so, he asked her, "Do you know what I'm doing?"
"Yes," she replied, "you're checking for any abrasions or dermatological abnormalities." "That is right," said the doctor.
He then began to fondle her breasts. "Do you know what I'm doing now?" "Yes," the woman said, "you're checking for any lumps or breast cancer." "Correct," replied the shady doctor.
Finally, he mounted his patient and started having sexual intercourse with her. He asked, "Do you know what I'm doing now?" "Yes," she said. "You're getting herpes, which is why I came here in the first place."

 

[dysfunction]

Originally posted by Insane


The local morgue would be nosier than this place!

at least the company proxy hasnt fallen over yet

Thats nothing compared to the Accounting Department!

 

[Durzel]

Ricky Gervais - the man, the myth, the legend.

 

[Shocko]

Good stuff, all


Not likely to split my sides with laughter, but certainly worth a chuckle or two

 

[Wij]

ouch, my s1d3s !

 

[Moving Target]

Originally posted by Durzel
Ricky Gervais - the man, the myth, the legend.

From Reading...

 

[Summo]

This one did actually make me laugh

 

[Kippa.]

Marry me Summo