I asked this girl out........

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old.dalehead

Guest
.....there is a girl in my office.
I asked her if she would like to go out for a drink, and she replied "although your a nice guy, and rather handsome and witty, i'm affraid your not my type".
I was knocked back by this, as I am used to women falling at my feet......those that have met me will understand why, so I felt the need to ask her what her type is.
She replied she prefered Rug Munchers, she was a todger dodger, that she drank from the furry cup.
I was still a little confused here, after all we all have our little quirks.
I asked her to explain a little more, to which she replied "I eat from a bushy plate, i've never kissed the purple headed warrior, and I don't get turned on by hunky good looking blokes".

Well, i think this went straight over my head, caus when I asked her what I could do to make her more interested, she said there was nothing short of taking hormones, cutting off my nob, and smeering myself with Matthesons fish paste.

Now it could be just me, but i think she's going to make some guy very happy :)
 
O

old.G00SE

Guest
invasion.gif
 
O

old.Pavlos

Guest
Tell her that your a lesbian trapped inside a mans body.
 
O

old.dalehead

Guest
Originally posted by Pavlos
Tell her that your a lesbian trapped inside a mans body.
Click to expand...

But but but..... i've never been to Lebanon?
 
M

Mr B

Guest
I don't want to burst your bubble...but sometime women just pretend to be a lesbian if they want to let down some ugly, acne-riddled loser who they wouldn't shag if they were mad, blind desperate for cash and incontinent - but they want to ensure that he doesn't commit suicide afterwards.

Just a thought!
 
O

old.ÜB3R 1337 H4X0R

Guest
Originally posted by Mr B
I don't want to burst your bubble...but sometime women just pretend to be a lesbian if they want to let down some ugly, acne-riddled loser who they wouldn't shag if they were mad, blind desperate for cash and incontinent - but they want to ensure that he doesn't commit suicide afterwards.

Just a thought!
Click to expand...

|-|3 $chp33|< fr0|\/| 3Xxxp3R13nC3 FF$!!!"` L)))))))))))))))))L¬!¬! n3rD¬¬ @DD
 
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Summo

Guest
Mr B is the only person not on Ignore here and I think this thread is more amusing because of it. :)
 
M

Mr B

Guest
Yes I do speak from "3Xxxp3R13nC3" - I have a lot of female friends who use that technique when I introduce my "less socially acceptable" friends to them...

Oh, and I did chuckle at the irony of "n3rD¬¬"

:)

B
 
O

old.dalehead

Guest
Originally posted by Mr B
I don't want to burst your bubble...but sometime women just pretend to be a lesbian if they want to let down some ugly, acne-riddled loser who they wouldn't shag if they were mad, blind desperate for cash and incontinent - but they want to ensure that he doesn't commit suicide afterwards.

Just a thought!
Click to expand...

Or......maybe just maybe, I didn't ask her out, and I made it up to see if you had a sense of humour......hmmm, now which was it?

Oh yeah, i remember.
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stfu.jpg
 
M

Moving Target

Guest
B is considerably more intelligent than you so...

Shut%20the%20f-ck%20up-Arnold.jpg
 
M

Mr B

Guest
Or......maybe just maybe, I didn't ask her out, and I made it up to see if you had a sense of humour......hmmm, now which was it?
Click to expand...

Really?

Well, I must say you had me fooled there!!!!

</nu_sarcasm>
 
M

Mr B

Guest
I said "chuckle" not "chuck one over"...

You appear to have a masturbation complex (tertiary), may I suggest a girlfriend?
 
S

Summo

Guest
That's identical to mine, Hash. I've seen Mellow here before so be careful not to lump him in with the cnuts.

Welcome back, Mellow but these are troubled days we live in.
 
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old.dalehead

Guest
Originally posted by SomeGuy
That's identical to mine, Hash. I've seen Mellow here before so be careful not to lump him in with the cnuts.

Welcome back, Mellow but these are troubled days we live in.
Click to expand...

If i'm on your ignore list, you won't read me calling you a fart-knocker then will you :)
 
T

Testin da Cable

Guest
ooh, another one! this would be fun if it wasn't so sad heh
 
M

Mellow-

Guest
Originally posted by SomeGuy
That's identical to mine, Hash. I've seen Mellow here before so be careful not to lump him in with the cnuts.

Welcome back, Mellow but these are troubled days we live in.
Click to expand...

Thanks Summo, may I call you that? I've been around a bit and tend to read more than post though, agreed though, these are indeed troubled days.
 
O

old.dalehead

Guest
Originally posted by throdgrain
Spot the 12-year old :rolleyes:
Click to expand...

Where?
If you can prove any of us HLCCL people are actually 12 years old, you win a prize. Its only a £1 Tesco's voucher, but that prolly means a lot to you.
 
S

Summo

Guest
Frankly, fella you can call me whatever you like. It's refreshing to speak to somebody 'new' who doesn't automatically jump on my Ignore List.

In fact you can shag my sister the instant she comes into being.
 
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