How many..


Fledgling Freddie
Dec 23, 2003
Q: How many forum members does it take to change a light bulb?

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

1 to move it to the Lighting section

2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section

7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

5 to flame the spell checkers

3 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, just to add "Me too"

5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again..

[Taken from my guild forums humor section :D]


One of Freddy's beloved
Aug 3, 2004
Dont forget about the ones that will go * XXX player is a lame, adding git. He never changes lightbulbs solo.*


I am a FH squatter
Jan 22, 2004
FFS lighbulb only needs changing cos XYZ zerged it!


Can't get enough of FH
Dec 22, 2003
hehe its missing

1 Forum person(TROLL!!!!!) to to bump it after 3 months
12 forumites flaming the troll for mindless bumping
1 mod to lock the topic :p


Fledgling Freddie
Dec 23, 2003
This just puts a whole new meaning to the word "light tank" doesn't it?


Queen of OT
Jan 4, 2004
................. you forgot
-the one person to do a totally random post

last time a bulb blew here is Tequila Towers i had to change it myself as bf was asleep, he is tall so can change a bulb with out aid of leg extending items, i on the other hand am a mere 5 foot so had to get the step ladder, this caused the vaccum cleaner to fall over causing a loud thud which made my guinnea pigs (pookie and sprockett) start squealing , running about and generally causing mayhem... the resulting noise did not rouse my bf so in actual fact he never knew of the impending doom i was about to face.

section 2 "Ez climbs the Ladder"

being so short i am mortally afraid of heights infact back in 1987 i tried on my first pair of high heels, thus causing my nose to bleed and sending me in to a state of shock, several people had to be summoned to get me off said heels, so climbing a step ladder is quite a challange, half way up i started to get the shakes, causing ladder to rattle and more squealing from pookie and the sprock, which made it hard to concentrate, as i ascended i could feel the air growing thinner, sweat dripped in to my eyes, the salt stinging them, i blinked it away not able to wipe my eyes with hands as letting go of ladder would surely result in my demise....

one more step and i would be at the summit, i looked back on my illustrious carrea as a foor dweller with some fondness recalling all those happy times spent lurking by the skirting boards and chasing dust bunnys, a sudden flicker to my right brought me back to my sences i was getting delerious from lack of oxygen a moth was trying to headbutt the lightbulb back to life and failing miserably i had to not only keep my balance and prevent a catastrophic fall in to oblivion but also had to fend off the native wildlife, whilst trying to remove dead bulb and retrieve new one from my pyjama pocket.
it was all too much for me i felt like giving up and falling backwards like ripley in alien 3 but i had to do it, i had to do it for the good of all humanity!!

finally the bulb was in place i slowly descended the ladder, legs trembling, my hair hanging in my face so i coudlnt see my footing properly, wuld i make it? how could i survive this terrible ordeal? would life ever be the same again???

finally i got to the ground, if the carpet wasnt so manky i would have dropped to my knees and kissed the floor, but there were guinnea pig hairs and flakes of old fag ash down there so i didnt, the moment of truth was upon me.... would the new bulb work??

Light there was once again light in my life and i had survived the most terrifying experience of that morning!

when my boyfriend woke up and found me shuddering in the corner reliving the past 2 minutes and suffering post traumatic ladder experience he looked at me with puzzled eyes and said

"but i changed it before i went to bed last night!"


Fledgling Freddie
Dec 23, 2003
Huntingtons said:
i just wanna inform you that it still only takes 1 to change it ;-D

Under health and safety regulations, it takes 4: 1 to do a risk assessment, 1 to change the bulb, 1 to hold the step ladder and 1 to monitor the changing process to look for developing hazards and possible h&s improvements!

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