Good Excuses for Being Late

[Gurnox]

Didn't get to bed till four in the morning last night. Was heroically drunk. This led me to be somewhat late for work. My excuse?

"I was c**ted off my marrow"

Which probably wasn't the best.....

Any of you got any good ones that I can use next time? If they also disguise the stench of booze, that would be a bonus.

 

[nath]

Well, being in London I can always blame the tube. To excuse the stench, you chould say some drunk hobo barfed on you.

 

[Wazzerphuk]

Witnessing a traffic accident is a good one. Say you had to wait as you saw the incident to give a statement to the police. They won't think of doubting you.

Obviously this can only really be used once a year or so.

 

[sibanac]

Just replace the word hangover with migrane attack and call in sick

 

[FuzzyLogic]

Public transport's my favourite, it's not always a fabrication either

 

[Wazzerphuk]

"Hello yes is that the boss? I can't come in today, I'm haveing a migraine attack."

"Arer you ok, does he have a knife?!"

hrhr :/

 

[Dweller]

Didn't get to bed till four in the morning last night. Was heroically drunk.

Ah, that explains this

 

[old.user4556]

say "i've got dreadful diarrheoahahhee (sp? )"

No one will ask for proof, no one will question it, no one will enquire when you'll be better.

"i'll be in the office when i can"

 

[Bullitt]

My favourite was 'Sorry i'm late, I was walking in a head wind'

 

[Lazarus]

kids are great excuses!!!!

 

[kingcon]

I was supposed to be in a meeting at the weekend, (them coming to me).. There excuse I hear you ask? A chip in their windscreen ...

 

[.Wilier.]

tbh, there is no excuse for being late.......ever.

Although, as Laz says, kids are good for an excuse or three.

 

[PLightstar]

I heard a great one this morning someone said there oatso simple was to hot and they couldn't eat it fast enough, she was 20 minutes late.

 

[Paradroid]

Roadworks.

 

[Hawkwind]

I guy I used to work with once came in about 30 mins late. His excuse, "I was experimenting with leaving later".

The only reply he got was, "It worked then!"

Mind you this is the same retard that on thinking he was going to get the sack spent nearly £2000 on his company Corporate Amex buying new white goods. The reason he was nealry sacked. He was working as a Support Rep for an Avionics company on a US Marine Base and was caught shagging the 19 year old daughter of the Base Commander in the mess hall. He was banished to Rome for 2 years as punishment and made to pay back the money.

 

[Chilly]

Banished good word, that man!

 

[Insane]

The reason he was nealry sacked. He was working as a Support Rep for an Avionics company on a US Marine Base and was caught shagging the 19 year old daughter of the Base Commander in the mess hall. He was banished to Rome for 2 years as punishment and made to pay back the money.

somehow that doesnt sound at all bad for banging a 19yr old bird a 2yr extended holiday in rome of all places! fit birds galore!

and isnt that how a credit card works? you buy the stuff then pay them it back?

somehow the punishment seems better than the offence!

 

[Driwen]

and isnt that how a credit card works? you buy the stuff then pay them it back?

yes, but it was the companies card. So I guess he thought the company would have to pay the money back.