A
Arnor
Guest
posted this on the daoc ot, but since I love you all so much, heres a friendly reminder: "Bills quick capsule review: Piece of shit"
Which pretty much sums up this rant on the compilation and infestation of crap not earlier preceded in a big hollywood "production" to my rapidly failing memory that Charlies Angels 2: Full throttle is.
Saw the trailer some months/weeks ago and thought: "Looks like a crap film, prolly gonna be some good action and maybe some t&a" Lo and behold, my pregocnitive gland tried futily to warn me from this genocide of a movie
It's now 3 hours after I saw it, and the shit has really started to fester, its what you can call the rambling manifestation of whats wrong in this world. (well ok, there are some saving graces in the film, but its still at terminal velocity bound to hell. one can hope atleast)
If you want a better film, at all levels, go watch Dreamquest and add a dose of "the good old ultra-violence" that Malcolm McDowell loves so much in Clockwork Orange.
This is like the bastard lovechild of those porn films which arent porn (dont play innocent, you know the ones im talking about ), and TnT(http://us.imdb.com/Title?0131046)
The """""""humour"""""" is everything but, and its carpet bombed all over this film roll and its making my eyes and ears bleed.
Its full of cheesy comments and sexual """""""""""innuendo""""""""" which just gets embarrasing and makes you feel sorry for the celebrities that gets this smeared all over their repetoire like blood on your wedding dress that even QuickNBrite cant clean. (Bruce willis, Demi moore, pink, the angel crew, party-boy from jackass, that irish crazy dude from braveheart with the scar etc) The movie is full of celeb cameos, the only one with half a brain in the original crew must be Bill Murray who was the only one with brains enough to butt out, he was subtly replaced by a sad pathetic waste of skin dubbed Bosley)
Bosley's real name in this film is Token, no matter what anyone says, Bosley is charlies angels2 token black guy. He is ""hip"", ""cool" and best of all """"""""""funny"""""""""""" I hate him and wished he died, slowly.
Just like some dude called "leo" is the token retarded sympathy kid, its all pathetic and makes baby jesus cry.
Now, some of you may think that this ""review"" is harsh, contains some weird words and uses too much "" """ I do this deliberately (and i love using lots of "" "" ) since I REALLY liked the first one, and therefore the fall was much bigger, this has made me bitter and sour (this was a retro-active change, and its why I have been bitter long before i saw this compilation of pain on screen.
PS: they have found a new thing called cg-effects that they have randomly plastered around the movie like cheap makeup on cheaper hookers.
I think the genre this falls into except from "babelfish english-spanish-english-spanish translated mad ramblings of all the lunatics in history" must be "nigh-erotica, ubarcheesy ACTION ACTION ACTION DIE IRL!!#"
I know its normal for secret agent movies to stretch the laws of physics and plausability, but this is savage raping of said laws with a aluminum bat dipped in glue&broken glass.
Now im gonna watch the first film and try to forget about that there ever was a sequel, then I will watch a real porn flick, and everything that the sequel started will be finished. (hopefully)
Which pretty much sums up this rant on the compilation and infestation of crap not earlier preceded in a big hollywood "production" to my rapidly failing memory that Charlies Angels 2: Full throttle is.
Saw the trailer some months/weeks ago and thought: "Looks like a crap film, prolly gonna be some good action and maybe some t&a" Lo and behold, my pregocnitive gland tried futily to warn me from this genocide of a movie
It's now 3 hours after I saw it, and the shit has really started to fester, its what you can call the rambling manifestation of whats wrong in this world. (well ok, there are some saving graces in the film, but its still at terminal velocity bound to hell. one can hope atleast)
If you want a better film, at all levels, go watch Dreamquest and add a dose of "the good old ultra-violence" that Malcolm McDowell loves so much in Clockwork Orange.
This is like the bastard lovechild of those porn films which arent porn (dont play innocent, you know the ones im talking about
), and TnT(http://us.imdb.com/Title?0131046)The """""""humour"""""" is everything but, and its carpet bombed all over this film roll and its making my eyes and ears bleed.
Its full of cheesy comments and sexual """""""""""innuendo""""""""" which just gets embarrasing and makes you feel sorry for the celebrities that gets this smeared all over their repetoire like blood on your wedding dress that even QuickNBrite cant clean. (Bruce willis, Demi moore, pink, the angel crew, party-boy from jackass, that irish crazy dude from braveheart with the scar etc) The movie is full of celeb cameos, the only one with half a brain in the original crew must be Bill Murray who was the only one with brains enough to butt out, he was subtly replaced by a sad pathetic waste of skin dubbed Bosley)
Bosley's real name in this film is Token, no matter what anyone says, Bosley is charlies angels2 token black guy. He is ""hip"", ""cool" and best of all """"""""""funny"""""""""""" I hate him and wished he died, slowly.
Just like some dude called "leo" is the token retarded sympathy kid, its all pathetic and makes baby jesus cry.
Now, some of you may think that this ""review"" is harsh, contains some weird words and uses too much "" """ I do this deliberately (and i love using lots of "" ""
) since I REALLY liked the first one, and therefore the fall was much bigger, this has made me bitter and sour (this was a retro-active change, and its why I have been bitter long before i saw this compilation of pain on screen.PS: they have found a new thing called cg-effects that they have randomly plastered around the movie like cheap makeup on cheaper hookers.
I think the genre this falls into except from "babelfish english-spanish-english-spanish translated mad ramblings of all the lunatics in history" must be "nigh-erotica, ubarcheesy ACTION ACTION ACTION DIE IRL!!#"
I know its normal for secret agent movies to stretch the laws of physics and plausability, but this is savage raping of said laws with a aluminum bat dipped in glue&broken glass.
Now im gonna watch the first film and try to forget about that there ever was a sequel, then I will watch a real porn flick, and everything that the sequel started will be finished. (hopefully)