Cold Callers
- Thread starter Thadius
- Start date
Mikah75
Can't get enough of FH
- Joined
- Jun 30, 2004
- Messages
- 3,251
you are ex-directory yeah?
bit of a bastard even if you previously weren't, many places use like 5year old telephone directories, because they're sneaky like that
i get the odd 1 or 2 a week, but we've been ex-d for 15years here, soon as theres a pause on answer i just hang up
my friend andy 2 doors up though, its just ridiculous, counted 17 in a day once:|
bit of a bastard even if you previously weren't, many places use like 5year old telephone directories, because they're sneaky like that
i get the odd 1 or 2 a week, but we've been ex-d for 15years here, soon as theres a pause on answer i just hang up
my friend andy 2 doors up though, its just ridiculous, counted 17 in a day once:|
Bracken
Fledgling Freddie
- Joined
- Jan 7, 2004
- Messages
- 2,368
Hilarious when they tell you their name is something very English (e.g. Christine) when they are clearly not. It's usually at that point when I stop them and say "1. I haven't given you my number 2. I have not asked to be on your database and 3. I don't believe for one minute your name is Christine. Goodbye".
Alternatively if they are particularly pushy they get a round of f*cks
Alternatively if they are particularly pushy they get a round of f*cks
![[HB]Jpeg](/data/avatars/m/7/7231.jpg?1319140928){kind=avatar}
[HB]Jpeg
Loyal Freddie
- Joined
- Jan 22, 2005
- Messages
- 420
some of em are stupid as fuck... i ussually tell em to fuck off.. or wind em up .
a couple of wind up i HAVE used in the past are
Electric company asking me to change supplier.
reason i dont need to swap: I have a big Gerbil on a running wheel thing powering up the whole house with a dynamo. (dumb fucker stayed on fone for a good 5-10 mins before he actually tok the hint.)
Phone company.
I DONT have a phone.. im talking to him through a Banana (spent 15 mins on fone with this guy) i even said to him half way through "are you really that stupid to think im gonna change phones" and he still carried on very polite trying to sell me a phone line lol
a couple of wind up i HAVE used in the past are
Electric company asking me to change supplier.
reason i dont need to swap: I have a big Gerbil on a running wheel thing powering up the whole house with a dynamo. (dumb fucker stayed on fone for a good 5-10 mins before he actually tok the hint.)
Phone company.
I DONT have a phone.. im talking to him through a Banana (spent 15 mins on fone with this guy) i even said to him half way through "are you really that stupid to think im gonna change phones" and he still carried on very polite trying to sell me a phone line lol
Lamp
Gold Star Holder!!
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Messages
- 23,261
Try transferring them to the office fax machine
or wind em up...play along - really enthusiastic. Say yes to everything they're flogging you. Ask for more. Then when it comes to payment, ask them if they can touch their ass with their penis. If they say yes tell em that they can go fuck themselves then, and hang up.
or wind em up...play along - really enthusiastic. Say yes to everything they're flogging you. Ask for more. Then when it comes to payment, ask them if they can touch their ass with their penis. If they say yes tell em that they can go fuck themselves then, and hang up.
Hansmoleman
Fledgling Freddie
- Joined
- Jun 27, 2004
- Messages
- 1,653
before you start 'laying' into them, remember it might just be a student trying to earn some drinking money =/
Hansmoleman
Fledgling Freddie
- Joined
- Jun 27, 2004
- Messages
- 1,653
odd, never had any cold calls here that early..Lamp said:
Alan
Fledgling Freddie
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- Aug 3, 2004
- Messages
- 3,972
Aww come on Thad, these things are the only joy I get each day - relish them !
For the indian sales people just keep repeating "Sorry I cant understand you" "nope sorry I didnt quite get that" "urm, say again?"
For the other sales people just drag the calls out, my record was 18m for a double glazing salesman before he hung up on me
For the indian sales people just keep repeating "Sorry I cant understand you" "nope sorry I didnt quite get that" "urm, say again?"
For the other sales people just drag the calls out, my record was 18m for a double glazing salesman before he hung up on me
Lamp
Gold Star Holder!!
- Joined
- Jan 16, 2005
- Messages
- 23,261
Hello, my name is Ruprecht and I'm calling from Offtheshelf Direct. Do you own your own self-flagelating sanitary air-cooled Stannah stairway with built-in 400 text messages and the chance to win £1,000,000, a tour of Switzerland's Navy, or a luxury 5-star trip to the Sudan ?
Gggrrrr
Gggrrrr
Alan
Fledgling Freddie
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- Aug 3, 2004
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- 3,972
Svartmetall
Great Unclean One
- Joined
- Jan 5, 2004
- Messages
- 2,467
I love it when the fuckers even lie about what they are...
*ring ring*
ME: Hello?
TELESALES PLANKTON: Hello, am I speaking to the homeow-
ME: Is this a sales call?
T.P.: No, no, not a sales call at all, we merely want to help you save money on your mobile pho-
ME: Piss off and don't call this number again or I'm reporting you to OFTEL.
*click*
My approach seems to work.
*ring ring*
ME: Hello?
TELESALES PLANKTON: Hello, am I speaking to the homeow-
ME: Is this a sales call?
T.P.: No, no, not a sales call at all, we merely want to help you save money on your mobile pho-
ME: Piss off and don't call this number again or I'm reporting you to OFTEL.
*click*
My approach seems to work.
Thadius
Part of the furniture
- Joined
- Sep 5, 2004
- Messages
- 8,824
- Thread starter
- #29
Tears said:
Thats my usual answer
Once an india woman rung up trying to flog me a mobile
She says I bet you have lots of girlfriends, i say no
She goes well just the one?
I say no Im gay
She goes you want to call him all the time then?
I say no, why would I want to call a guy for, Im straight
This went on for ages, poor bitch was so confused!
Adrianicus
Loyal Freddie
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2004
- Messages
- 230
Nice link at start thanks! Signed up for that!
It really pisses me off especially when I only have my line for broad band and odd external call. Tempted to unplug my phone.
What annoys me is that I opted for ex-directory when I signed up yet I still get them.
When I asked one guy how he got my number he said a database had it, the info was taken off the electoral register which you go when you buy a new property. What puzzled me was that I didnt have a phone line set up when i bought my flat!
Another thing I was told when I asked how they got my number, was that they randomly change the last 4 digits. They know the area code and middle 4 digits and change the last. If thats the case I guess there is no way of stopping them unless you get BT to bar them.
Dont get me started on foreign calls and call centres.
I bet stinking BT sell out new phone number lists to companies and databases.
So frustrating when you get more telecalls than calls you make yourself.
It really pisses me off especially when I only have my line for broad band and odd external call. Tempted to unplug my phone.
What annoys me is that I opted for ex-directory when I signed up yet I still get them.
When I asked one guy how he got my number he said a database had it, the info was taken off the electoral register which you go when you buy a new property. What puzzled me was that I didnt have a phone line set up when i bought my flat!
Another thing I was told when I asked how they got my number, was that they randomly change the last 4 digits. They know the area code and middle 4 digits and change the last. If thats the case I guess there is no way of stopping them unless you get BT to bar them.
Dont get me started on foreign calls and call centres.
I bet stinking BT sell out new phone number lists to companies and databases.
So frustrating when you get more telecalls than calls you make yourself.