A scouser walked into the local job centre...

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SilverHood

Guest
A scouser walked into the local job centre, marched straight up to the counter and said "Hi, I'm lookin' for a job.".

The man behind the counter replied "Your timing is amazing."

"We've just got a listing from a very wealthy man who wants a chauffeur/bodyguard for his nympho daughter. You'll have to drive around in a big black mercedes, uniform provided. Because of the long hours of this job, meals will also be provided and you will also be required to escort the young lady on her overseas holidays. The salary package is £200,000 a year."


The scouser said "Nah, you're bullsh*tting me!".





The man behind the counter said "Well you started it!"
 
N

Nala Lionne

Guest
I'm just about to head off to Liverpool for uni, hope I don't turn into a scouser :eek: :eek: :eek: :(:(:( :m00:
 
S

SilverHood

Guest
only one way to tell:

When you meet your old friends, they lock you in the living room when going ot the kitchen
 
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Nala Lionne

Guest
Originally posted by SilverHood
only one way to tell:

When you meet your old friends, they lock you in the living room when going ot the kitchen
Click to expand...

Is this speaking from past experience? :p
 
O

old.tRoG

Guest
ROFLLMAOWGCBBLESALLADLBHTAGUYBTIRGSIA

let the contest for the longest laughing thinger begin.

honestly, i need to start thinking of better replies to these joke threads.
 
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SFXman

Guest
Do you even have a meaning for that?
I got one which I do actually, it was made by me some months ago:
ROTFLTHTSASTCMMMWIATIHEPMASCTPATTMTMHAAOTIYFYSFPOSWYLJTMMLTMYB = Rolling On The Floor Laughing Too Hard To Stop And Scaring The Cat, Meanwhile My Mom Walked In And Thought I Had Eaten Poinsonous Mushrooms And She Called The Paramedics And They Took Me Too Mad House And All Of This Is Your Fault You Stupid Fathead Piece Of Shit With Your Lame Jokes That Make Me Laugh This Much You Bastard
 
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Nala Lionne

Guest
Originally posted by SFXman
Do you even have a meaning for that?
I got one which I do actually, it was made by me some months ago:
ROTFLTHTSASTCMMMWIATIHEPMASCTPATTMTMHAAOTIYFYSFPOSWYLJTMMLTMYB = Rolling On The Floor Laughing Too Hard To Stop And Scaring The Cat, Meanwhile My Mom Walked In And Thought I Had Eaten Poinsonous Mushrooms And She Called The Paramedics And They Took Me Too Mad House And All Of This Is Your Fault You Stupid Fathead Piece Of Shit With Your Lame Jokes That Make Me Laugh This Much You Bastard
Click to expand...

You really are far too proud of that :p
 
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old.tRoG

Guest
ROTFLTHTSASTCMMMWIATIHEPMASCTPATTMTMHAAOTIYFYSFPOSWYLJTMMLTMYB

-Random Funny Joke/Picture/Comic Reply Generator 3000™
 
F

Farnis

Guest
I'm just about to head off to Liverpool for uni, hope I don't turn into a scouser
Click to expand...

Please dont come to Liverpool - stay away - we dont need your sort. Why the hell do you want to go saying stuff like that - you think we are all tw@ts or something?? If so - why surround yourself with them.

Numb nuts.
 
U

Uncle Sick(tm)

Guest
Originally posted by Farnis


Please dont come to Liverpool - stay away - we dont need your sort. Why the hell do you want to go saying stuff like that - you think we are all tw@ts or something?? If so - why surround yourself with them.

Numb nuts.
Click to expand...

Well... reading your post made me think: what a twat!

Dominus Feces
 
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Farnis

Guest
Well reading your post, makes me think..who gives a shit what you think kiddo.
 
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Uncle Sick(tm)

Guest
Hmmm..... just had a look at your profile, Mr. Ladykiller (har har).. and I must say: how can I compete against someone who is "Cooler than a cool person in cool land on cool pills !"?

... check the birthdate again, Mr. Ladykiller (...)... you put in 1975 accidentally. Don't worry, sport... 7 is right beside the 8... it happens sometimes.

Dominus Feces
 
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Farnis

Guest
Glad ive had an effect on you. Please feel free to look at my profile whenever you want.

Are you saying im acually 17 and not 27 - ahh - id love to be 17 again...thanks for the compliment though....

what is feces...some clever play on words..does it mean something funny in another language or something?

As I said earlier kiddo...i dont care what you say about me....but i understand your fixation.
 
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old.The McScrooges

Guest
Hey!!

No flaming in Spamalot. Save that kind of crap for the regular forums.

Sheesh, next we'll all be going off topic...
 
B

Belsameth

Guest
Originally posted by Farnis


Please dont come to Liverpool - stay away - we dont need your sort. Why the hell do you want to go saying stuff like that - you think we are all tw@ts or something?? If so - why surround yourself with them.

Numb nuts.
Click to expand...

no more coffee for you sir. :p
besides that. your reaction seems more of a 17th then of a 27th. but I guess years say very little about ones age :)
 
F

Farnis

Guest
Aye - i agree - its petty and immature....but having listened to this stuff for 10 years off people who actually believe it...it starts to grate...
 
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Nala Lionne

Guest
Yeh you need to calm down my grandparents come from Liverpool .... I was only joking.

what is feces...some clever play on words..does it mean something funny in another language or something?
Click to expand...

Seriously? Get a dictionary for that one :) English will do.
 
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old.The McScrooges

Guest
Oops. I was being ironic.

Actually I have a funny scouse joke, but its quite long.

You just need to go to the zoo and take home the advice they give you there.

"Don't feed the animals."
 
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Danya

Guest
Originally posted by Nala Lionne
Seriously? Get a dictionary for that one :) English will do.
Click to expand...
/em gets out a Scouse-English / English-Scouse dictionary. :D
 
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Orin Askhammare

Guest
<looks outside to check if the hubcaps are still on his car>
 
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Brinx

Guest
Opened again on the primise of non-flaming :p

Seems we're entering another IRC style post-count raising flaming period after having quite a good couple of weeks which is a shame.

/me adds all your names to a piece of paper to take with him to Trebz's house in a few weeks.

Be wary of the little black book of derogatory forum titles!
 
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Uncle Sick(tm)

Guest
Originally posted by Orin Askhammare
Sicko doesn't have a birthday :(

:fluffle:
Click to expand...

That's true... I was summoned :D

And Brinxie... you can't scare me!! Not you!! *cowers*
Hey... I want a derogatory title... that's the whole point:)
 
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old.Gombur Glodson

Guest
2inbear.jpg


I bring in the silly dancing bear of joy to make us all feel better
 
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old.tRoG

Guest
NO! BRING IN MR. SCRUFFFLES!!!!!!!!1111!!!!111
 
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