3 Pints of Guiness

[Vladamir]

Three Pints of Guinness ...

An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of
Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out
of each one in turn. When he finished all three, he comes back
to the bar and orders three more.


The bartender says to him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I
draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time."
The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One
is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin.
When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to
remember the days we all drank together."


The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it
there. The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar and always
drinks the same way: he orders three pints and drinks the three
pints by taking drinks from each of them in turn.


One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other
regulars in the bar notice and fall silent. When he comes back
to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't
want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my
condolences on your great loss."


The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a lights dawns
in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he says, "Everyone is fine.
It's me..."


"...I've quit drinking!"

 

[Overdriven]

Haha, that's cool ^^

 

[Thorondorito]

awesome haha

 

[pip]

2 horses in a bar having a drink
a grey hound sat at a table behind em
1 horse turns to the other and says, i was racing the other day i was in last place then i got a trebble pain in my arse and shot up to the front and won.
The other horse said, thats funny i was racing at epsom was in 5th place got a pain in my side and shot up to front place and won.
The grey hound sat behind em said sorry to intrude but i was racing last week was in last place got a pain on my left ear shot up past the lot and caught the rabbit.
1 horse turns to the other and says fook me get a load of that a talking grey hound

 

[cog]

I prefer pip's!

 

[razeredge]

An american walks in to a pub in Ireland and say, 'I've heard great things about your drinking exploits here in Ireland, and i dont believe a word of them, I have 500euros here that says, noone in this bar can drink 20 pints of guiness without stopping or falling over unconcious at the end", at this a hush came over the bar and old man sitting in the corner gets up and leaves, the american orders a beer, and goes on gloating saying he knew noone had the guts, and the stories were false, after a while the old man returned and took up the american on his challenge, sure enough he downed the 20 beers in no time at all, the american gave him the money, and said to him "that way very impressive, do u mind if I ask why u left the bar when i first asked?" The old man said "Well i wanted to go to the pub next door to make sure i could do it first"

 

[Commandment]

An american walks in to a pub in Ireland and say, 'I've heard great things about your drinking exploits here in Ireland, and i dont believe a word of them, I have 500euros here that says, noone in this bar can drink 20 pints of guiness without stopping or falling over unconcious at the end", at this a hush came over the bar and old man sitting in the corner gets up and leaves, the american orders a beer, and goes on gloating saying he knew noone had the guts, and the stories were false, after a while the old man returned and took up the american on his challenge, sure enough he downed the 20 beers in no time at all, the american gave him the money, and said to him "that way very impressive, do u mind if I ask why u left the bar when i first asked?" The old man said "Well i wanted to go to the pub next door to make sure i could do it first"

lols i know too many old men just like that

 

[Ezteq]

hehe excellant jokes guys... now i only hope i can remember them because i actually have people to tell them to now lol.

 

[Huntingtons]

nice one vlad \o/ pip's quite, well pip

 

[Vladamir]

nice one vlad \o/ pip's quite, well pip

Pip rox

 

[leviathane]

lol

 

[Punishment]

An american walks in to a pub in Ireland and say, 'I've heard great things about your drinking exploits here in Ireland, and i dont believe a word of them, I have 500euros here that says, noone in this bar can drink 20 pints of guiness without stopping or falling over unconcious at the end", at this a hush came over the bar and old man sitting in the corner gets up and leaves, the american orders a beer, and goes on gloating saying he knew noone had the guts, and the stories were false, after a while the old man returned and took up the american on his challenge, sure enough he downed the 20 beers in no time at all, the american gave him the money, and said to him "that way very impressive, do u mind if I ask why u left the bar when i first asked?" The old man said "Well i wanted to go to the pub next door to make sure i could do it first"

Hahahaha