Revenge!

[swords]

(posted from b3ta boards)
when i was younger, i discovered my live-in bf was cheating on me with this skanky broad, she was staying over on the weekends when i had to work out of town and she left a bottle of vag. deoderant. When i discovered the bitter, ugly truth i moved out, but before i left i put a liberal amount of chile oil in her cnut perfume, i heard she and the asshloe ex had to go to the ER....... as they had a nasty burning sensation.........hahaha

and:

Upon leaving the marital home for the last time I added some extra protein to my ex-wifes favorite drink Tia Maria. I was most destressed to find out she'd thrown me a leaving party I was unable to attend. However, it does give me great satisfaction that she and her friends swallowed one last time.



Anyone else got any funny stories related to revenge?

[Sissyfoo]

Ha ha! Nice one!

At uni, I was having trouble sleeping the night before a big exam, when the fat Londoner in teh room next door to mine came back at 3 in the morning singing 'I Love You Baby!'.
I walked out of my room and shouted for him to shut the fu*k up, at which point he beat the crap out of me.
A week later I was all alone with a friend after a few pints of cider, I told him what had happened, and he suggested revenge. So I pissed in the fat Londoners bottle of sarsons Vinegar.
For the rest of my first year I watched him and the rest of the people on my corridor feast on fish and chips with my special vinegar, I felt sorry for them all when they started getting sick. But then why should I feel guilty?

[swords]

Cucumber
Oooh Got another one, Also from Uni days.

I remember being told a story by a girl I knew at Uni. I must admit she was a bit of a fruitloop!

At one point she was living in an all female residence and she had a falling out with one of the other girls in the house. One day she happens to be looking in the fridge and spots that her enemy has bought a cucumber for dinner. She decides to 'borrow' the cucumber.

What did she do with it? Well let's just say, she was feeling a little bit horny that day and that it was the closest thing to a man she could find!

Does she, chuck the cucumber in the bin or replace it? No. She puts it back in the fridge as if nothing has happened.

Cut to later that evening. Her enemy is tucking into a nice cucumber salad. "mmmmmmmm she says, this cucumber is delicious!"


^^ bets one!

[Asha]

cucumber story is well old, and bs