Baby James

I know I've made a general forum thread about this with plenty of replies, but thought I'd let go some of my deeper feelings about the subject in here, away from the prying eyes of normal lurkers and the likes.

So, as most folks will know, at 5:36am on Tuesday 26th August 2008, baby James Peter Mallard was born.

An interesting and busy sequence of events that started on Sunday morning leading up to Wednesday evening when we finally got home.

Sunday, 5:35am: Rude awakening. "Niiiiiick!!!"
"uuuughhhh?"
"I think my waters have broken" - standing in a large puddle in the bathroom.

6:00am: Phone call to labour ward, then head into hospital. Wendy checked over and given all clear at 9:30am, advised to go about our daily business then head back at 10pm that night.
So, we promptly trotted off to a pre-organised slap-up roast dinner at my Dad's gaff - HUGE yorkshire pud, fantastic fresh beef from the Butcher and the works.

10:00pm: Into labour ward, everything dropped off, Wendy settled in by 2:00am. I head off to mothers house nearer hospital to get some shuteye.

8am through to 11pm Monday 25th August: Sat in hospital, incurring monster car parking charges. Ironically, we've spent literally twice as much paying for car parking over 3 days than we have for clothes or disposals for the baby.

11pm Monday: Contractions under a minute apart. Very painful, so stayed with her until 2:30am where the contractions were staying frequent. Dilation checked, and told there'd be a few hours yet, so I should go kip in the car for a couple. No problem, gave them my mobile and that I'm on the nearest side of the car park so they know where I am.

4:30am Tuesday. Full on labour. It's coming and there's no two ways about it. Wendy is screaming, shouting and abusing the midwives in every way possible. Suitable painkillers, gas & air given. In the meantime, I'm still fast akip, albeit awkwardly in my car driver seat.

5:10am. Epidural given.

5:25am. I receive a phone call. "Hi Mr Mallard, Wendy is ready to see you now."

5:27am. I wander in, onto labour ward. Into the room where I know Wendy is residing. Christ - 5 staff members crowded round, legs akimbo, although the Mrs could quite easily have been asleep.

5:32am. Head appears. Wendy didn't even flinch.

5:36am. Full birth. Baby James arrives in full bloom.

9:30am. Back up onto ward with baby, a day of checking, prodding and poking awaits us. Wendy is wide awake despite all the previous nights happenings with no wish to sleep; she's far too overjoyed. I'm sitting there enjoying every move he makes, watching him wriggle and grin.

8:30pm. A day of poking and prodding shows James has a low temperature, signs of an infection - Lots of skin to skin contact to help him warm up and it does the trick, but they want to keep an eye. Another overnight stay, much begrudged to the hospital-hating Wendy. I head off at 10:00pm to get some kip at my mums, and get just about none, wanting to be with my wife and baby.

8:00am Wednesday: Temperature is back up and checks look promising, but 2 midwives here a slight murmur on his heart - an ECG and blood pressure check is ordered.

10:40am : Head down to ECG, a process taking less than 5 seconds but undressing and dressing takes about 10 minutes - he just LOVES to boogy! Results are promising.

5:40pm : Head down to Neo-Natal for blood pressure check. After a lot of wriggling and boogying, the check is complete and all is healthy. The paediatrician, whom the night before Wendy asked if he was a paedophile (getting words mixed up on the cocktail of drugs!) came along and listened in, confirming the baby's heart murmur was tiny and merely blood vessels opening and collapsing as required at this very early stage. "You're good to go home!" is the best news we've had since delivery.

8:10pm : Hometime. My mum called to stay the night for moral support & to look after baby whilst mother & father get some well required sleep. Baby sleeps all the way home looking very comfortable in the car seat.

Fantastic stuff. It's been a long time coming, and a long process getting through the last few days, but the baby is here, alive and well.

I've stopped referring to him as "it" and "the baby" or "baby bump" and we have in front of us, a small person. The midwife checked him over at home today, noting two unusual things: 1. he has a single fold in his right hand rather than the normal 2, which is getting more and more common but won't affect normal life apparently. I'm not even sure what it means!, and 2. he appears to have strength and control in his neck, something babies shouldn't have at this age. He's looking around, picking his head up and keeping it firm when being picked up - very odd.

But, none of it is bad. Tomorrow will be spent doing the paperwork - registering him at doctors & clinic, then all the benefit forms.


So, how does it feel to be a father for the first time?

Wonderful. I can just sit and watch him move around and I find it fascinating. I have a fixation on how things work and I look at his movements as if I would a tiny robotic machine, the inside of a hard drive etc, with awe at how it works, amazed how something so small is so perfectly formed and in full working order.
Sitting in awe as he grabs my finger and holds on tight, or yanks on my chest hair with enough strength to bring a tear of pain to my eyes. Watching him fall asleep on Wendy's chest, content, peaceful and with a smile.
Grinning myself as he hiccups or sneezes, or the array of odd squeaks he makes when sleeping. Grimacing when he pulls a certain face - a look of bemusement and mischievousness. The look that says one thing and one thing only.

"Daddy, there's a present in my pants."